Strict Parenting

[Gleneere]

Yes of course it helped. I'm an Type A over achiever of highest calibre, I've never let my GPA slip below a 3.5. I think such a thing might demand seppuku. (Just Kidding) Being blind, black, female, and "supposedly" pretty I always wonder about someone's motives when I'm taking on a task or job. I don't want to fill a quota. I don't want charity. I'm not a sex toy. You could say I have a fear of being seen stereotypical in any way, and my self-confidence is rather small.

I'm sorry, did you say you were blind? Just got to make sure I understood.

Besides that, I'm not sure why you transitioned into not wanting to be "used" by your employers.. Do you mean that you work hard in order to be recognized for your merit rather than your demographic? If so I'd say that's a positive mode of thinking, not a negative one (though that's just my opinion), and as such I think the parenting style you had was actually beneficial for alleviating your complex... Hypothetically if you did not have the academic strictness you may have less to offer besides your demographic, which you seem to fear.

On that note, would you condone that style of parenting?

Hmm it really depends on what you mean by strict. My parents were strict. I do not condone their parenting style, ever. I don't know the answer to your question, I suppose parents should just try to do their very best to do what's right for their children and that's the best they can do.

I suppose when I said "strict" I really was focusing on strict in the academic field, at least until they are 18. I think this is because kids simply don't understand long-term gratification, and so I feel like this could be a way to get them to understand it, at least in retrospect, later on in life.

I think it's got to be a mixture of carrot and stick.

My parents were the polar opposites; my dad was an NCO in a section of the British special forces (SBS) and my mom was just, well, an administrator at a University.

My dad was very tough on things whilst my mom, whilst very much academically minded (she eventually got a Masters whilst looking after me and my disabled younger brother) was more of "you can do whatever you put your mind to!" kind of woman.

I ended up succeeding quite successfully at school and later University to the point where I'm now doing a PhD. I think a mix definitely helped though.

I can see your point. A parent who has decent success from hard work is more likely to try to endow the same work ethic in their child because they simply understand the method more... Hence why many East Asian, et al. immigrants generally have that attitude in raising their own kids.
I am Caucasian and neither of my parents finished higher education. I'm sure that's in part why they aren't as tough on me, though my father is extremely intelligent, just not the book kind.

The Tiger Mom parenting style isn't what most imagine it is:

The first major study of tiger moms is out. The kids have worse grades, and they are more depressed and more alienated from their parents.

My experience sounds much like Sejanus'. School came easy for me; I made As and Bs while taking all the egghead classes. I didn't miss any assignments, but had plenty of time for discovery (fucking around).

I'm skeptical how everyone (according to your article) can observe many East Asian family styles producing high-achieving children, yet data doesn't seem to support it... I mean I feel like there is a good reason for that stereotype to exist, though of course I'll be looking into it further.

I'm the same in a way, As and Bs were normal for me as well, but I did get Cs and Ds on the rare occasions when I felt like the work was not worth a small little grade. Again, I bring it back to the idea that perhaps the little letter just wasn't taught to me to be as important as it is. Long story short, I always kept up with the lessons, just not the work, so it surprised people when they found out I didn't have the highest grade, despite the highest scores I got on the tests.