everyone (else) seems to be hating on atheists

[Aiza]

ok, atheists are the ones who are psychotic and socially maladjusted.

No on average irreligious folk are slightly more so, there are plenty of exceptions. Here are some of the studies I was thinking of, and if you want I can get more, with respect to mental illness, relationships and even physical health:

Religion and the five factors of personality: a meta-analytic review (Irreligious have higher degrees of psychoticism)
Religion and depression: a review of the literature. (Irreligious at greater risk of depressive disorders)
Religious Affiliation and Suicide Attempt (Irreligious have greater aggression and impulsiveness, less reasons to live)
Religiosity, Homogamy, and Marital Adjustment (Irreligious have poorer marriages)
The Influence of Religion on Fathers' Relationships With Their Children (Irreligious fathers are less supportive)

Also correlation =/= causation either way: atheism doesn't make you depressed, but perhaps depressed people who aren't thinking clearly become more alienated from their communities and therefore are also more likely to become alienated from their religion. Either way I don't condone stereotypes since there are plenty of aggressive, impulsive, psychotic, abusive religious people and friendly, thoughtful atheists who are wonderful fathers and husbands. To go onto a non-religious example: men, on average, commit more crimes than women do, are more prone to certain mental disorders, are slightly more selfish on average, and most dictators have been men. But it would be really dumb to stereotype all men that way or to not trust men over something like that. I try to judge people as individuals first. When I post these studies its just the tiny grain of difference which, combined with atheist communities being mainly about criticizing "theists"/religion, combined with many terrible anti-religious persecutions committed by atheists in living memory, ends up adding to an unfair stereotype of atheists as being hateful or aggressive, when most are the same as anyone else.

But again: it ends at the unfair stereotype and mild distrust. When it comes to real hate crimes or persecutions, atheists by far get off rather easy. There's never been a state-sponsored mass-murder of atheists like there has been for...well nearly anyone else, and atheists are pretty well underrepresented in terms of being the victims of hate crimes, unlike Jews or Muslims. So for me these sorts of threads bring up mixed feelings: while stereotypes are wrong and I don't want people to distrust atheists....can you really pretend like you have it the worst, when atheists haven't suffered half the persecution as most other groups, and almost no violence at all?

in fact, it makes me wonder, if this wasn't part of the reason you converted (back) to a theist - to fit into the more socially accepted group. didn't have the fight to stand on your own? needed more friends? just curious.

Not at all. I never felt like I was standing on my own, most of my friends were atheist or very apathetic. If anything, the reason I became atheist was to be more socially accepted. Right now I feel much more "alienated" to be honest, though its not a bad feeling...it feels like I have a secret within me that is very beautiful. Its more of a feeling of excitement and being apart from the world. Even among religious folk, I have met very few IRL who are as devout as I am, let alone in my own peer group. Some of my friends don't even know that I am a theist now, let alone one who wants to be a sister! Most of the new friends I've made have been other discerning women, I see them visiting convents or in some online groups. But eventually we will have to part, when one of us enters one convent and the other one enters another.