Irish on both sides of the family. My maternal grandmother was a McPhee, she married a man called Jenkins, said she admired his cat. He got the cat from his brother's widow, her that was keeping illicit company with the local fishmonger. The fishmonger's wife was called 'Rosie' or 'Ruthie' (the records are a bit smudged), and she carried a glass eye in the pocket of her apron to frighten the local children with. She lost they eye in a game of All-Fours (dealer trumped on the jack and she didn't see it). The dealer was Seamus O'Donahue - not the O'Donahue who sank the ferryboat with the Protestant parson and the grey mare aboard (that was his brother Eamon). The parson eventually recovered (the mare was lost), and married an Englishwoman who owned a tattoo parlor and dildo emporium.
My father's father never amounted to much. He was once arrested and jailed for inserting citrus fruits into the recta of random sheep. One of the sheep belonged to 'Meekly' Harris, a man who once claimed to have set fire to a barbershop in Kingston, Jamaica. After paying the vet's bill to have two lemons and a tangerine removed from his sheep's lower intestine, Harris claimed it put him off lamb for life. Oddly enough, he developed a passion for citrus fruits. Harris was married to Enid Weatherwax, a local seamstress with a pathological fear of needles. She never made a lot of money at her trade. Enid's sister Miranda married Eamon O'Donahue of ferryboat fame (see above) but it didn't last. She eventually left him and took up with a man who had two wooden legs and no left ear. They have 17 children, all called 'Ferguson'.
Thank you for the opportunity to talk about my ancestors.
Boru
My father's father never amounted to much. He was once arrested and jailed for inserting citrus fruits into the recta of random sheep. One of the sheep belonged to 'Meekly' Harris, a man who once claimed to have set fire to a barbershop in Kingston, Jamaica. After paying the vet's bill to have two lemons and a tangerine removed from his sheep's lower intestine, Harris claimed it put him off lamb for life. Oddly enough, he developed a passion for citrus fruits. Harris was married to Enid Weatherwax, a local seamstress with a pathological fear of needles. She never made a lot of money at her trade. Enid's sister Miranda married Eamon O'Donahue of ferryboat fame (see above) but it didn't last. She eventually left him and took up with a man who had two wooden legs and no left ear. They have 17 children, all called 'Ferguson'.
Thank you for the opportunity to talk about my ancestors.
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
