Names of places in Croatia

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

I have a new theory about Croatian place names.

Prior to WWII, places in Croatia had no names - people would just say things like, 'That town over there', etc. As part of the Marshall Plan, however, people from all over Europe were encouraged to submit random strings of letters to be considered as names. These were carefully picked over by a highly qualified team of rabies-infected weasels, who would choose names via the tried-and-true method of pooping on some of them. The select pooped-on names would then be assigned to various towns, cities, mountains, rivers and Apple Genius stores in war torn Croatia (this part of the process was personally overseen by an inebriated Winston Churchill, which explains a lot). Anyone who submitted a name that was eventually chosen was given their choice of either six chocolate bars or a packet of Russian 'Trud' cigarettes.

Boru

So, you think ancient historical sources which mention Croatian names of places are fake? That Pliny didn't really write "Contra Iader est Lissa." ("Iader" being the ancient name for Zadar and "Lissa" presumably being the ancient name for Ugljan), that Strabo didn't really attempt to etymologize Croatian island names Issa (ancient name for Vis) as being related to the placename Antissa on the Greek island of Lesbos and Pharos (the ancient name for Hvar) as being related to Greek island name Paros...? That this is all post-World-War-2 fabrication? At all libraries world-wide that have copies of Strabo's and Pliny's works? And that Mayer's work from 1930s is also post-World-War-2 fabrication?

All the sources you mention are part of a vast conspiracy designed to make you think that Croatian place names are ancient. Even the very first emperor of Croatia (Vlakschmeer The Easily Amused) had no idea where he was from. Why? No place names.

Boru