Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: April 23, 2024, 10:13 am

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Jesus is My Savior.....
#1
Jesus is My Savior.....
No... not that phony crucified cocksucker....


Jesus Stoning


this Jesus works for the air conditioning repair company and he ascended into the "hell" of my attic to fix a broken fan motor. Then he came back down and said that "all is good."

I gave him a couple of bottles of water and he didn't walk on them....he drank them.

Praise Jesus.
Reply
#2
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
Yeah, but GOD gave him the knowledge on how to fix it. You silly.
Self-authenticating private evidence is useless, because it is indistinguishable from the illusion of it. ― Kel, Kelosophy Blog

If you’re going to watch tele, you should watch Scooby Doo. That show was so cool because every time there’s a church with a ghoul, or a ghost in a school. They looked beneath the mask and what was inside?
The f**king janitor or the dude who runs the waterslide. Throughout history every mystery. Ever solved has turned out to be. Not Magic.
― Tim Minchin, Storm
Reply
#3
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
No, no...he had a manual. In English and Spanish.
Reply
#4
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
(May 12, 2012 at 8:01 pm)Minimalist Wrote: No, no...he had a manual. In English and Spanish.

All Hail Jesus fixer of the fan motor and holder of the manual!

Worship (large)
Reply
#5
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
Wait....wasn't that in the fucking bible?

"They shall call his name the Manual?"
Reply
#6
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
(May 12, 2012 at 8:10 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Wait....wasn't that in the fucking bible?

"They shall call his name the Manual?"

They had a manual on fixing fan motors in the bible? If so I may have to change my mind on that shit!
Reply
#7
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
If they did that would make the bible useful and it isn't.
Reply
#8
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
(May 12, 2012 at 8:10 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Wait....wasn't that in the fucking bible?

"They shall call his name the Manual?"


ROFLOLROFLOLROFLOL

Bloody hell Min, I was drinking coffee. It's OK,I managed to miss the keyboard and hit Shadow.


Quote:If they did that would make the bible useful and it isn't.

A friend once told me that the pages from cheap bibles make great spliffs.Thinking
Reply
#9
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
(May 12, 2012 at 8:39 pm)padraic Wrote:
(May 12, 2012 at 8:10 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Wait....wasn't that in the fucking bible?

"They shall call his name the Manual?"


ROFLOLROFLOLROFLOL

Bloody hell Min, I was drinking coffee. It's OK,I managed to miss the keyboard and hit Shadow.



Yeah... these

[Image: spitcoffee2.gif]

are tough on keyboards and monitors.
Reply
#10
RE: Jesus is My Savior.....
He deserves a raise.
My ignore list




"The lord doesn't work in mysterious ways, but in ways that are indistinguishable from his nonexistence."
-- George Yorgo Veenhuyzen quoted by John W. Loftus in The End of Christianity (p. 103).
Reply





Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)