Why do feminists have such a bad reputation?

[LastPoet]

I remember a greeting card from the late 60's/early 70's. On the outside it said " So, you're a liberated woman? Good!"

And on the inside it said " I always wanted to fuck one " with a cartoon of two people going at it.

Funny the things that the brain retains in memory.

Not everyone is a living fossil Min

[thesummerqueen]

Min has better humor about age than my grandparents did. When I was a tyke, I asked my father how the artists in the book I was reading knew what dinosaurs really looked like. He told me to go ask my grandfather, because he was old enough to know.

Let's just say I learned what side of the family gave me the "hot" temper.

[Minimalist]

The only alternative to getting old is dying young. Not a great choice.

[frz]

Misogyny, misandry? Man, what's the world coming to?

[TaraJo]

I'm going to start out by saying that there's a lot more good feminism than there is bad feminism. But there is undoubtedly bad feminism and it's adherants are so toxic they make the whole group look bad by association.

It's been clear as day to me. The issues of sexism that have hurt me the most directly are the sexist notions that generally hurt men more than women. Specifically, I have children from 'before' but I don' know if, when or how I'm going to see them and a large part of that has to do with the way the state of Oklahoma treats anyone with the title 'father.' Fact was, my ex was able to be a manipulative bitch and the law was on her side. Yet, if ever I made the mistake of trying to talk about about my own problems with sexism, I hear a dismissive "what about the menz" while they go back to talking about rape culture. Or, if they're feeling especially malicious, they'll go on to tell you none of those issues are real issues. Sorry, ladies, but if you're telling me I might never see my children again and that's not a 'real' problem, I automatically despise you like the scum you are.

But the flip side to that is that these same people, if you suggest men form their own groups to talk about sexism from men's perspective, they react like you just slapped them in the face. I can't count how many times they've told me "Feminism talks about those issues!" I'm not saying all feminists are like this, but there are unquestionably a lot of them.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg. You can find these kind of unreasonable all over the place. They have several sub reddits if you go over to reddit, they've turned the term 'social justice tumblr' into a joke, they're all over youtube (usually with comments and ratings turned off) and they're on facebook. There's an unofficial skeptic group on facebook with a few of these feminists who have gotten into a shit storm with me when I suggested they're wrong (one of them even blocked me). They're constantly fixated on telling me how much worse women have it than men and I'm telling them that no matter how bad women have it, it still doesn't justify treating men like garbage and it doesn't mean issues or concerns of men should be dismissed.

To give an example of the kind of damage they can do, there's my boyfriend. Like me, he is transsexual, but he's female-to-male (born girl, wants to be a boy). He was raised in a religious fundamentalist household. We can debate how women are treated in other aspects of society, but in highly religious environments, women aren't considered much more than just breeding stock. So, he's gone to feminist sites and blogs and social sites, seeking healing from the painful misogyny he was raised with. Problem is, he goes to them and they tell him how awful and misogynistic and oppressive and hostile men are and it hurts him there, too. It leaves him in a difficult position: where can he go to heal from a painful, misogynistic childhood that won't attack him for identifying as male?

And that was it for me. You want to know the surest way to get on my bad side? Hurt someone I care about.

On the other side of things, I'm extremely reluctant to side myself with people like Rick Santorum or Todd Akin. Part of me does wonder if there's something I'm missing, that they must see something I don't, but I'm unable to have a conversation with them that doesn't result in their hostility. It almost seems like, unless I get some borg-brain-link thing going on, they're going to react with hostility to anything I say. There was an article I read on The Guardian that expressed a lot of those conflicted feelings I have on the issue.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/...commenters

But I also think this is, in part, just another unfortunate side effect of the internet. There are a lot of people who now just get onto the internet and don't have to interact with anyone they disagree with. It removes them from hearing different perspective or points of view and really makes them closed minded and it's frustrating.

[Shell B]

women need to take note of what men are attracted to.

Why? I'm not a fan of feminazis, myself, but this is just stupid.

Women should just be themselves, and it just so happens that there's a particular way of being that is naturally attractive and appealing to men, just like there's a natural masculine manner which is attractive to women.

ORLY? Welp, that explains why so many different looking people get laid all the time.

If you've ever looked at women's dating profiles, you'll notice a massive difference in the way that western women sell themselves compared to women from other parts of the world.

Bloody hell. Sell themselves?

It's like night and day. Western women have very much lost touch with what men want.

Forget feminists. You are pissing me off and I'm a men's rights advocate.

I'm all for equality but you have to be careful what you mean by equality.

Yeah, you do.

It's like a black slave trying to act free by painting their face white, or a cat trying to be equal to a dog by barking. It doesn't work.

I know! A person acting like a person to be more like a person is just fucking carazy!

And when you criticise them, out comes the shaming language.

I agree there. Feminists tend to be crazy. You are also crazy.

[bladevalant546]

I'm going to start out by saying that there's a lot more good feminism than there is bad feminism. But there is undoubtedly bad feminism and it's adherants are so toxic they make the whole group look bad by association.

It's been clear as day to me. The issues of sexism that have hurt me the most directly are the sexist notions that generally hurt men more than women. Specifically, I have children from 'before' but I don' know if, when or how I'm going to see them and a large part of that has to do with the way the state of Oklahoma treats anyone with the title 'father.' Fact was, my ex was able to be a manipulative bitch and the law was on her side. Yet, if ever I made the mistake of trying to talk about about my own problems with sexism, I hear a dismissive "what about the menz" while they go back to talking about rape culture. Or, if they're feeling especially malicious, they'll go on to tell you none of those issues are real issues. Sorry, ladies, but if you're telling me I might never see my children again and that's not a 'real' problem, I automatically despise you like the scum you are.

But the flip side to that is that these same people, if you suggest men form their own groups to talk about sexism from men's perspective, they react like you just slapped them in the face. I can't count how many times they've told me "Feminism talks about those issues!" I'm not saying all feminists are like this, but there are unquestionably a lot of them.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg. You can find these kind of unreasonable all over the place. They have several sub reddits if you go over to reddit, they've turned the term 'social justice tumblr' into a joke, they're all over youtube (usually with comments and ratings turned off) and they're on facebook. There's an unofficial skeptic group on facebook with a few of these feminists who have gotten into a shit storm with me when I suggested they're wrong (one of them even blocked me). They're constantly fixated on telling me how much worse women have it than men and I'm telling them that no matter how bad women have it, it still doesn't justify treating men like garbage and it doesn't mean issues or concerns of men should be dismissed.

To give an example of the kind of damage they can do, there's my boyfriend. Like me, he is transsexual, but he's female-to-male (born girl, wants to be a boy). He was raised in a religious fundamentalist household. We can debate how women are treated in other aspects of society, but in highly religious environments, women aren't considered much more than just breeding stock. So, he's gone to feminist sites and blogs and social sites, seeking healing from the painful misogyny he was raised with. Problem is, he goes to them and they tell him how awful and misogynistic and oppressive and hostile men are and it hurts him there, too. It leaves him in a difficult position: where can he go to heal from a painful, misogynistic childhood that won't attack him for identifying as male?

And that was it for me. You want to know the surest way to get on my bad side? Hurt someone I care about.

On the other side of things, I'm extremely reluctant to side myself with people like Rick Santorum or Todd Akin. Part of me does wonder if there's something I'm missing, that they must see something I don't, but I'm unable to have a conversation with them that doesn't result in their hostility. It almost seems like, unless I get some borg-brain-link thing going on, they're going to react with hostility to anything I say. There was an article I read on The Guardian that expressed a lot of those conflicted feelings I have on the issue.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/...commenters

But I also think this is, in part, just another unfortunate side effect of the internet. There are a lot of people who now just get onto the internet and don't have to interact with anyone they disagree with. It removes them from hearing different perspective or points of view and really makes them closed minded and it's frustrating.

I Think you have a unigue out look on this. Reverse Sexism is definatly and issue and thank you reconizing that. IT is true women do have it bad in some situations. I believe where the worse misandry and male discrimnation occurs is with in the legal system. Where a man is torn apart like the poor sheep he is. Thank you for your open mindedness. I think it is taking a step further to realizing our potiental as a species.

I feel once we realize we should be working together instead of having a pissing contest to get more entitlments. Better we can progress socially.

To address Violet, sorry I actually mean judge by someone character not accept in that means. I apologize very poor choice or words. And you are right equality is a hard word to define. We are not equal in the literal sense, however I believe when I call for equality in my defintion is more attributed to economic, law, and social equality. I feel that everyone should have the same chance economically (with out communism of course), same kind of representation through law, and finally socially accepted (with in reason of their character, no assholes right?). When i spoke of unity is more unity in vision not in philosophy. Basically we all should be unified in forward progression and improving our technology, social structure, and knowledge. Forget monetary profit and other pointless destructive things.

[frz]

You know what I think? People are letting a lot if misconception cloud their judgement of what the real problems are. Because if one gender hates the other and vice versa then, why get together, why are we fucking? Its non sense. Typically someone is making an excuse to hide the real issue Behind the problem.

[thesummerqueen]

Personally I think even if some women DO hate men, since they have no legislative power and don't want to fuck anything with a penis, Macky here should shut up and get on to worrying whether or not any woman still wants to fuck him after he tells her she has to act like she's Amish.

[frz]

Personally I think even if some women DO hate men, since they have no legislative power and don't want to fuck anything with a penis, Macky here should shut up and get on to worrying whether or not any woman still wants to fuck him after he tells her she has to act like she's Amish.

I believe in women's right to do whatever they please. Women always used to tell me I'm too nice but at the end of the day I'm still labeled as the same as all the other men. Idk. Something is not right there.