Posts: 14259
Threads: 48
Joined: March 1, 2009
Reputation:
80
Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 9:57 am
(This post was last modified: May 4, 2014 at 9:59 am by fr0d0.)
Inspired by Katie's intro thread
In my church, the salvation army, funerals are a celebration. But you'd be wrong to think that no one is sad.
Ever since I saw the funeral march in Live and let Die, with the band breaking into a celebratory dance, I've thought that's the way funerals should be. Why not celebrate the good things of a life rather than just focus on the loss.
We need to acknowledge the loss, sure. The point of funerals is to deal with it and to help us move on. Baggage like extended sadness is destructive.
Quote:Yoda: Careful you must be when sensing the future Anakin. The fear of loss is a path to the dark side.
Anakin Skywalker: I won't let these visions come true, Master Yoda.
Yoda: Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss them do not. Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed that is.
Anakin Skywalker: What must I do, Master Yoda?
Yoda: Train yourself to let go... of everything you fear to lose.
Posts: 997
Threads: 27
Joined: April 29, 2014
Reputation:
33
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 10:03 am
That's how I would prefer my funeral to be. I would be more comfortable with people gathering to drink and party at one of my favorite locations, rather than gathering in some field of tombs and crying.
Then again I would be dead, so I guess I wouldn't care. Whatever makes my loved ones happy.
Posts: 15351
Threads: 118
Joined: January 13, 2014
Reputation:
117
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 10:24 am
I know that my parents/siblings will turn my funeral into a religionfest, (and my ego cares but my rational side couldn't care less what they do) but I'd like it to be a party.
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great
PM me your email address to join the Slack chat! I'll give you a taco(or five) if you join! --->There's an app and everything!<---
Posts: 33127
Threads: 1412
Joined: March 15, 2013
Reputation:
152
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 10:32 am
(This post was last modified: May 4, 2014 at 10:32 am by Silver.)
I would prefer that there be no funeral upon my death. Just burn me to ashes and spread the ashes to any wind. I want there to be no sort of gathering whatsoever.
"Never trust a fox. Looks like a dog, behaves like a cat."
~ Erin Hunter
Posts: 30129
Threads: 304
Joined: April 18, 2014
Reputation:
92
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 10:41 am
I recall a funeral many years ago where the fundy preacher cited the deceased (28 year old friend of mine) as a negative example during the service since he died 'unrepentant', but the rest of us sinners could learn from that and escape the consequences if we would accept Jesus Christ.
During the grim fellowship time after the graveside portion of the service, his mom apologized to all of her son's disreputable and dissolute friends (me included) for the preachers remarks. She was having a very bad day as it was, it took some grit to do that and I have never forgotten it.
During the service, if looks could, in fact, kill, that preacher would have been reduced to a glowing fog of atoms, just from my stare, let alone the glares from all the others.
Posts: 997
Threads: 27
Joined: April 29, 2014
Reputation:
33
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 10:54 am
(May 4, 2014 at 10:41 am)vorlon13 Wrote: I recall a funeral many years ago where the fundy preacher cited the deceased (28 year old friend of mine) as a negative example during the service since he died 'unrepentant', but the rest of us sinners could learn from that and escape the consequences if we would accept Jesus Christ.
During the grim fellowship time after the graveside portion of the service, his mom apologized to all of her son's disreputable and dissolute friends (me included) for the preachers remarks. She was having a very bad day as it was, it took some grit to do that and I have never forgotten it.
During the service, if looks could, in fact, kill, that preacher would have been reduced to a glowing fog of atoms, just from my stare, let alone the glares from all the others.
Some people are sick.
Posts: 30726
Threads: 2123
Joined: May 24, 2012
Reputation:
71
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 11:06 am
I think funerals and weddings are a waste of money. You can do those things with very little money. I got married by a judge. When I die why the hell spend money on a casket I am not alive to know I am in, and cremation costs money too. I want my body donated to science. That way my family saves money and science gets to use my body for study.
Other than that, I do expect some gathering to mourn. But I would also want those who survive me to have another gathering where they give me a celebrity roast. My mom has a great quote on her computer monitor and I have the same quote on my van's visor, "Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened".
Posts: 14259
Threads: 48
Joined: March 1, 2009
Reputation:
80
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 11:09 am
(May 4, 2014 at 11:06 am)Brian37 Wrote: "Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened".
Damn stright
Posts: 19789
Threads: 57
Joined: September 24, 2010
Reputation:
85
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 11:14 am
(This post was last modified: May 4, 2014 at 11:16 am by Anomalocaris.)
(May 4, 2014 at 10:41 am)vorlon13 Wrote: I recall a funeral many years ago where the fundy preacher cited the deceased (28 year old friend of mine) as a negative example during the service since he died 'unrepentant', but the rest of us sinners could learn from that and escape the consequences if we would accept Jesus Christ.
During the grim fellowship time after the graveside portion of the service, his mom apologized to all of her son's disreputable and dissolute friends (me included) for the preachers remarks. She was having a very bad day as it was, it took some grit to do that and I have never forgotten it.
During the service, if looks could, in fact, kill, that preacher would have been reduced to a glowing fog of atoms, just from my stare, let alone the glares from all the others.
Who invited the preacher?
And why didn't anyone have the class and decorum to break some bones before throwing the preacher out?
Posts: 23918
Threads: 300
Joined: June 25, 2011
Reputation:
151
RE: Funerals don't have to be sad
May 4, 2014 at 11:32 am
Every time there has been a death or funeral service in my family, I've always had a wonderful day. I wouldn't describe it as giddy happiness. These days just feel more profound and real somehow. They just make me more tuned in to sights, sounds and associations that come to mind.
|