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God banged YOUR wife!
#1
God banged YOUR wife!
So modern day, your wife comes up to you and says "I am pregnant with the God's child, he will be our savior"

As a rational human being what do YOU say?

I want a 2-scenario answer.

Scenario 1: Your a christian, answer as if you were

Scenario 2: You are not nuts, answer as such
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#2
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
"You could have at least let me watch."
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#3
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
(May 8, 2014 at 5:26 pm)BlackSwordsman Wrote: So modern day, your wife comes up to you and says "I am pregnant with the God's child, he will be our savior"

As a rational human being what do YOU say?

I want a 2-scenario answer.

Scenario 1: Your a christian, answer as if you were

Scenario 2: You are not nuts, answer as such

Scenario 1: "I'm a christian? I have a wife? She's pregnant? I'm a lesbian? WTF?"

Scenario 2: "I have a wife? She's pregnant? I'm a lesbian? WTF?"

Tongue

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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#4
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
I sense a slight gender bias in this thread.
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#5
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
"Doubt it."

Christian or not, that would be my answer.
Poe's Law: "Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won't mistake for the real thing."

10 Christ-like figures that predate Jesus. Link shortened to Chris ate Jesus for some reason...
http://listverse.com/2009/04/13/10-chris...ate-jesus/

Good video to watch, if you want to know how common the Jesus story really is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88GTUXvp-50

A list of biblical contradictions from the infallible word of Yahweh.
http://infidels.org/library/modern/jim_m...tions.html

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#6
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
(May 8, 2014 at 6:15 pm)pocaracas Wrote: I sense a slight gender bias in this thread.

How so?

The story goes, marry was impregnated by god, she told Joseph. Not sure how else to mix it up :p
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#7
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
(May 8, 2014 at 7:33 pm)BlackSwordsman Wrote:
(May 8, 2014 at 6:15 pm)pocaracas Wrote: I sense a slight gender bias in this thread.

How so?

The story goes, marry was impregnated by god, she told Joseph. Not sure how else to mix it up :p

God knocks up your husband/boyfriend.

Now THAT might make the god worthy of attention.

ROFLOL

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
#8
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
1. I wouldn't believe it because it wasn't written in a 2000 year old book.

2a. I would ask, "Will 'God' be paying us child support?"

2b. I would say, "Have fun with your god-child at your new boyfriend's house."
[Image: 10314461_875206779161622_3907189760171701548_n.jpg]
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#9
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
(May 8, 2014 at 7:41 pm)Beccs Wrote:
(May 8, 2014 at 7:33 pm)BlackSwordsman Wrote: How so?

The story goes, marry was impregnated by god, she told Joseph. Not sure how else to mix it up :p

God knocks up your husband/boyfriend.

Now THAT might make the god worthy of attention.

That might make a believer out of me.

Hey Joseph - have fun passing that. Yuk yuk.
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#10
RE: God banged YOUR wife!
1. What the, why would god choose us for?

2. Yeah sure god's baby. I want a fucking paternity test, now get the fuck out.
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
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