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Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
#1
Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
Take this story with a grain of salt. Not sure if serious.

Quote: Christian Poincheval was enjoying a meal out with friends six years ago when he had his eureka moment and the idea for a new product popped into his head. What sparked his creativity? "After a hearty meal, we almost suffocated as our farts were smelly," the French inventor says, per Mashable. "The winds were not very pleasant for our fellow diners. I had to do something." Poincheval says he first visited a lab to investigate natural remedies for offending flatulence. After months of experiments, he had his invention: a line of pills Poincheval says help digestion and turn flatulence into "perfume" using 100% natural ingredients, the Telegraph reports.

Full article
http://www.newser.com/story/199200/inven...olate.html
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#2
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
There used to be excuses?
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#3
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
(December 2, 2014 at 8:06 am)whateverist Wrote: There used to be excuses?

I know right? Who would have thought that someone would suggest that farting wasn't twice the compliment that is burping?

I mean... they sat through your ENTIRE MEAL. That means it's either good, or they were starving... or you had a shillelagh to their dirty little guttersnipe. Either way: complimentary.

Quite unlike a shart, in that sense.
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
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#4
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
A shart? Okay, okay, I'll google it.
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#5
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
(December 2, 2014 at 8:45 am)whateverist Wrote: A shart? Okay, okay, I'll google it.

Ah, you've a chart to find the shart in your Wal-Mart shopping cart!
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
Reply
#6
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
(December 2, 2014 at 9:06 am)Alice Wrote:
(December 2, 2014 at 8:45 am)whateverist Wrote: A shart? Okay, okay, I'll google it.

Ah, you've a chart to find the shart in your Wal-Mart shopping cart!

And that is why kids should never be allowed to ride in the carts into which I place my fresh produce.
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#7
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
(December 2, 2014 at 9:10 am)whateverist Wrote: And that is why kids should never be allowed to ride in the carts into which I place my fresh produce.

Yes, I've always preferred to keep my children with the Pop-tarts, it's good to keep your keeping goods in one place: with the twinkies and the binkies. After all, you never know when you'll be in a jam and you need some jam, or a pickle for which the answer could only a pickle be... or a tickly with a stickly.

I am going to hell. Just as well, Twinkies went out of business anyway.
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
Reply
#8
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
Quote:After months of experiments, he had his invention: a line of pills Poincheval says help digestion and turn flatulence into "perfume" using 100% natural ingredients, the Telegraph reports.
Why not just dip his civvies in perfume before going out to eat? Even if his wind didn't smell any better, no one would sit within 50 feet of him. He could sing to his heart's content.
"Well, evolution is a theory. It is also a fact. And facts and theories are different things, not rungs in a hierarchy of increasing certainty. Facts are the world's data. Theories are structures of ideas that explain and interpret facts. Facts don't go away when scientists debate rival theories to explain them. Einstein's theory of gravitation replaced Newton's in this century, but apples didn't suspend themselves in midair, pending the outcome. And humans evolved from ape- like ancestors whether they did so by Darwin's proposed mechanism or by some other yet to be discovered."

-Stephen Jay Gould
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#9
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
(December 2, 2014 at 9:23 am)Alice Wrote: I am going to hell. Just as well, Twinkies went out of business anyway.

It hardly matters. They've made trillions of them and they last forever because nothing eats them.
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#10
RE: Finally, no more excuses for holding back farts
My excuse to not fart involves avoiding a messy pants because the only time it was a problem, it was a legit concern.
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