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Current time: February 4, 2025, 1:02 am

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Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
#1
Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
[Image: e-meter.jpg]

Ladies and gentlemen, you are looking at an E-meter. It measures the thetans in your system. Any intelligent person knows that thetans are frozen and brainwashed alien souls sent to this planet by the evil emperor Lord Xenu and implanted into your body to cause all of your fears and misgivings.

If Xenu didn't exist, the e-meters wouldn't move, because there are no thetans, but check this out!

[Image: Wii-Vitality-Sensor-and-Scientology-Perf...gether.jpg]

This is actor John Travolta working the e-meter like his life depends on it, and getting accurate thetan readings!

This is overwhelmingly obvious evidence that thetans and Xenu exist and play a very pivotal role in our lives. The next time you see a person on the street asking you to take a free stress test, don't just shun them off to the side, think about what they have to say.

Make sure you bring your credit cards as well.
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#2
RE: Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
I saw the name of this thread and laugh out loud at work.
"The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason." Benjamin Franklin

::Blogs:: Boston Atheism Examiner - Boston Atheists Blog | :Tongueodcast:: Boston Atheists Report
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#3
RE: Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
Gave me a laugh, too. Believe it or not.
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#4
RE: Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
It's as convincing as any xtian "evidence" we've been shown.


Which is to say "not very."
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#5
RE: Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
Oh No now John Travolta and Tom Cruise are in the closet......
Did I make a good point? thumbs up Smile I cant help it I'm a Kudos whore. P.S. Jesus is a MYTH.
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#6
RE: Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
[Image: P1000441.jpg]
Spirit Levels are also instruments designed to measure the strength of one's soul and can also be used to indicate whether its a predestined child of God or a brainwashed alien soul of the devil.

My spirit level is at "0" for some odd reason, maybe mine's broke? :B
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#7
RE: Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
Is there an app for the Iphone?
[Image: mybannerglitter06eee094.gif]
If you're not supposed to ride faster than your guardian angel can fly then mine had better get a bloody SR-71.
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#8
RE: Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
My friend is being stalked by Scientologists after he 'scored really well' on one of their tests...seriously. o_O
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#9
RE: Evidence Lord Xenu Exists!
I want to find some scientologist and take a test then roll my eyes in the back of my head fake a seizure sit up and say " Lord Xenu will be here soon and this will be his host" then seiz again and then stand up like nothing happend...... Let them morons support me in the life style Id like to become acustom to Smile
Did I make a good point? thumbs up Smile I cant help it I'm a Kudos whore. P.S. Jesus is a MYTH.
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