The sociopath next door

[Alex K]

Well now I'm really fucked. Thanks a lot Alex.

Relax, if your wife gives you a guilt trip, she's not a sociopath because of that

[brewer]

Well now I'm really fucked. Thanks a lot Alex.

Relax, if your wife gives you a guilt trip, she's not a sociopath because of that

It's not just a trip. It's like I'm permanent vacation.

[brewer]

*bump*

[Fireball]

I have one living next door. We've been dealing with it for years. I'm thinking of checking out some sort of community counselor that can sit us down and try to understand the behavior, but I suspect that it would be useless, and only give the bitch more ammunition to fuck with us. My wife wants us to "be the better persons" about it, but I'm having a tough time restraining myself.

[Whateverist]

Found on Marty Rathbun's blog,

https://markrathbun.wordpress.com/2016/1...pity-play/

an excerpt from Martha Stout's book "The sociopath next door"

From chapter 6 – how to recognize the remorseless

After listening for almost twenty-five years to the stories my patients tell me about sociopaths who have invaded and injured their lives, when I am asked, “How can I tell whom not to trust?” the answer I give usually surprises people. The natural expectation is that I will describe some sinister-sounding detail of behavior or snippet of body language or threatening use of language that is the subtle give-away. Instead, I take people aback by assuring them that the tip-off is none of these things, for none of these things are reliably present. Rather, the best clue is, of all things, the pity play. The most reliable sign, the most universal behavior of unscrupulous people is not directed, as one might imagine, at our fearfulness. It is, perversely, an appeal to our sympathy.

The description goes on. Does that remind you of anyone? A pretty common scheme among the most insidious and hard to grasp forum troublemakers if you ask me.

No one who has been around since December 3rd.

[Rev. Rye]

After listening for almost twenty-five years to the stories my patients tell me about sociopaths who have invaded and injured their lives, when I am asked, “How can I tell whom not to trust?” the answer I give usually surprises people. The natural expectation is that I will describe some sinister-sounding detail of behavior or snippet of body language or threatening use of language that is the subtle give-away. Instead, I take people aback by assuring them that the tip-off is none of these things, for none of these things are reliably present. Rather, the best clue is, of all things, the pity play. The most reliable sign, the most universal behavior of unscrupulous people is not directed, as one might imagine, at our fearfulness. It is, perversely, an appeal to our sympathy.

The description goes on. Does that remind you of anyone? A pretty common scheme among the most insidious and hard to grasp forum troublemakers if you ask me.

Honestly, by this point, it really reminds me a lot of many political extremists on both sides, whether it's the ultra-politically-correct (but largely irrelevant) left or the current right wing (both the alt-right who seem convinced that white people are a harried minority or the more traditional religious right who insist that paying for birth control via insurance infringes on their right to religious freedom).

If you can convince yourself (or others) that you're a persecuted minority who can spread bullshit through the language of civil rights and justice, it can be a lot easier than you think to consider any act of aggression as self-defense. The Nazis were convinced they were Europe's last stronghold against socialism and Jewishness, the Hutus convinced themselves that it was their duty to keep the Tutsis from coming back to power and oppressing them, and Pol Pot was convinced he was doing what needed to be done to make sure Americans didn't decide to fuck with them anymore.

Honestly, the way I see it, sociopathy is actually a lot closer to most of us than we might think. Given how extremely many seemingly normal people can react to more extreme circumstances (perhaps in response to politics or criminals.) Think about it. Only a relatively small percentage of us are like this all the time, but it's a lot easier to get into that mindset than one might think: just picture someone, just one person, and say to yourself that they don't matter. That their lives, their desires, would be better off destroyed. Maybe imagine some infamous criminal. Maybe some particularly horrific politician whose policies (and perhaps personal life) are so odious you can't help but wonder why he isn't in jail yet. Maybe someone like Osama Bin Laden. You see how easy it is to get into that mindset?

The common man and the sociopath are a lot closer than we'd like to think.

"He who fights monsters should see to it that he does not become a monster himself. And when you look long into the abyss, the abyss also looks into you."
____________Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil, Aphorism 146.