Mindfulness - help?

[Aroura]

A lot of what is described as meditation or mindfulness appears to be more about avoidance rather than awareness. 

Radical acceptance is anything but avoidance.

But for people unable to stop worrying about something they cant do anything about anyway, or angry about something they cannot change, this teaches people how to stop dwelling.

It's learning when to think on and accept things, and when and more crucially how, to let them go while still accepting them.
You should read up on the psycology of ot before being so dismissive.

[energizer bunny]

A lot of what is described as meditation or mindfulness appears to be more about avoidance rather than awareness. 

Radical acceptance is anything but avoidance.

But for people unable to stop worrying about something they cant do anything about anyway, or angry about something they cannot change, this teaches people how to stop dwelling.

It's learning when to think on and accept things, and when and more crucially how, to let them go while still accepting them.
You should read up on the psycology of ot before being so dismissive.  

If that works for you, great. My comment is a general observation not a direct comment towards anyone. Like shifting your mind towards something else rather than face what's inside you.

[Mystical]

A lot of what is described as meditation or mindfulness appears to be more about avoidance rather than awareness. 

Growing up, if I told my dad I hurt myself or something, he'd ask if I wanted him to bite off my finger and he'd play put my hand up to his mouth.

My dad's..weird. But, that said it kind of makes sense here. I'd think of how much it would hurt to have my finger bit off, and the pain I was feeling would subside, if only for those moments of shock that I endured at the thought!

Its not so much avoidance but rather focusing your attention. Don't take what I say as gospel-- I'm mostly a self learner. For me, physical pain is unavoidable, and so too have come coping methods. Is it incidental that the behaviors I've come to implement are actually written down elsewhere by other people with whom I've never met yet they themselves have had the same issyes as I have (like pain)? 

No. The human body reacts the same ways to certain things. This homogeneous effect is what we humans can count upon, for the most part, in our ability to relate with one another and to the world around us. Without pain we would not be able to know if we broke our toe which can be life threatening if infected, or we wouldn't be able to empathize with those in our Co optive society. 
But, if you're in enough pain.. distraction ceases to work.

As it pertains to meditation. 

For me, pain is just life when my autoimmune diseases are flaring and I need to be put on numerous chemo meds to treat them. Right now I go maybe 36hrs total in a weeks time, sporadically not in pain. There are different levels of pain. After a certain point, there are no distractions from that pain. You are blinded by it. It over takes your thoughts, and movements. Writhing in pain, for instance. It's a coined phrase for a reaction biological entities endure when in massive amounts of pain that their consciousness cannot escape! But up to that point, there are numerous ways one can cope with pain and uncomfortability with mindfulness. It just depends on the situation, and you really do have to find the most effective technique from many, for you. There are basic ones that always work though. Distraction is one. Pinch your earlobe with your nail and you won't feel the needle while getting blood drawn, for instance. 

Ok my hands hurt I gotta stop. Sorry I didn't finish my point but there's the gist of it. :

Thanks for te resources miss Aurora, I plan on che king them out for sure!  

[Sal]

I practice mindfulness, and have since 2008.

It's not a cure-all for depression and/or anxiety. It's merely about making your more alert about your immediate surroundings and not dwell too much about whatever concerns your might have. This in turn, in my experience all these years, has made me more content about the present and whatever current situation I'm in.

A thing to note about mindfulness, it's more about a state of mind than the practice itself. All that stuff about concentrating about your senses is just what you start out with, IMO. I usually just use 5-10 minutes every morning just clearing my head before the start of the day. It's not something I need to concentrate that much anymore about, which is why I think it's more of a state of mind where you're thinking of nothing at all and just staring into the air.

[emjay]

A lot of what is described as meditation or mindfulness appears to be more about avoidance rather than awareness. 

I think that's a bit of a double edged sword/fine line, at least for how I think about mindfulness. In that there's a difference between avoidance and truly letting something go... the former is repression/running away and the thing keeps coming back but the latter is more like a conclusive decision ie 'I don't want this, I don't need this'. So the way I think of mindfulness is to try and be aware of your mental state... anger, worry etc and make a decision on whether you want it or not. Given that you only have so many moments of life, you have a choice what to do with them, and if you recognise a futile mental state that only brings you down... like anger or worry about a situation you can't change... you can choose to let them go and let go of whatever keeps them going... such as feelings of pride or whatever in an argument... for the greater good. You could say it was avoidance, and maybe it is in a sense, but ultimately there's nothing obliging you to get sucked into any of those mental states except choice, sometimes more free than others... and as soon as you're objectively aware of a mental state you have a choice.

[Edwardo Piet]

In that there's a difference between avoidance and truly letting something go

There is if what you're avoiding is letting something go

Those folks who don't wanna avoid things are just avoiding avoiding goshdarnit!

Personally, I, myself, am a rather large fan of avoiding avoiding avoiding myself, myself.

[emjay]

In that there's a difference between avoidance and truly letting something go

There is if what you're avoiding is letting something go

Those folks who don't wanna avoid things are just avoiding avoiding goshdarnit!

Personally, I, myself, am a rather large fan of avoiding avoiding avoiding myself, myself.

I'm sorry, you've lost me I get lost in double negatives, and in your case, not just them but also triple and quadruple negatives Any chance of a rephrase?

[Edwardo Piet]

I'm saying I don't avoid avoiding things... I avoid that

It's just a confusing way of saying I don't avoid things

[Longhorn]

First of all - thank you all so much for your input and responses. I do appreciate it very much. I knew I could count on this place to provide good feedback. I was getting a bit lost with different sources. I'll check out what you all recommended, so thank you again

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I've dabbled with meditation and there is evidence that, long term, it can have some positive benefits. However it's also a hard road strewn with land mines of people saying it does this or that, or that the right way is such and thus. It becomes very easy to fall into a trap of practicing what you believe meditation to be, when, it might not be that. I could give my own advice, but that would be falling into the same trap. Ultimately, because the field of mindfulness / meditation is filled with so much bullshit, you're basically, ultimately, on your own for determining what it is and what it means to you. The only advice I'd give is not to vary your practice, as that can be a distraction, like servicing an itch you feel while engaged in mindfulness. Pick something and stick with it. I would also recommend picking something simple and relatively easy to do. Counting breaths is a good one. Otherwise you might get lost in worrying whether you're doing it right or not. The point is to do it, and persevere even when you get discouraged. Mindfulness and meditation are habits that take practice to be useful.

I know more about meditation and pain mitigation. The only thing i know as doctor taught mindfulness is to look at details of things in your immediate location and describe them, say to yourself a descriptor of these objects. Like "I see my lamp, my lamp is green." And just keep doing that. Avoid any other thoughts.
While your brain is doing that, it's not focused on anything else if youre doing it right.
It helps if you're in the throes of anxiety.

This is essentially how I practice mindfullness. If I'm feeling distressed, I remove my mind from the distress through object meditation and breathing. I find it useful to touch an object, so I use my DnD dice. I describe how they look and feel to myself.
If I'm out of the house, anything can work. A pen, a slip of paper, your steering wheel (please be parked if you use that one!).

As Jör says, there is a lot of BS out there, and it's ultimately a personal thing. Try different things until you find the technique that seems to click for you, then go for it.

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These I've found particularly helpful.

I've tried body scans and being aware of the body, thinking about breath and counting breaths. These work to a varying degree but mostly I can't seem to concentrate for longer than a few seconds on them. I have however noticed that I naturally tend to direct my attention to my immediate surroundings - thinking things like 'I am here. The grass is green, the sky is blue' and such, describing my situation. This works best for my focus, does the job and fits my intention, so I think I'll stick to that instead of trying to make other things work, so thank you, ladies, for helping me stop worrying over if I'm doing it right

A lot of what is described as meditation or mindfulness appears to be more about avoidance rather than awareness. 

While I realize this was not intended towards me, or anyone in particular and that you might be right - I don't know, I'm only interested in this practice for the purposes of my personal recovery - I wanted to take this opportunity to explain better why I'm doing this. The reason I got interested in it was one of my sources mentioning it being used in therapy for people in my situation and I do see how it is helpful.

As you said, I have faced what I needed to face. The problem is that oftentimes, my mind will remind me of it again and again, every day, in the least preferable circumstances. What I need mindfulness for is grounding myself in the present moment, precisely so I can face the past better. Instead of getting lost in it, I can remind myself where I'm standing whenever it rears its ugly head again, so I can look it in the eye without fear. That's what this is for, to me.

Thank you guys again. Cake for everyone

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I've been on anxiety meds for nearly 20 years, and mindfulness combined with yoga and radical acceptance is the first non medication treatment that's ever worked for me. I'm down to fragments of my pills, and my taper will be complete and I'll be med free within a month!

Also, congratulations Aroura! I'm glad to hear it

[mediocrates]

I tried the lotus position once... I ended up hurting myself, so I went back to being fully awake.  Although, I do like to regain unconsciousness on weekends.