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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:01 pm
(April 7, 2018 at 1:30 pm)Bahana Wrote: This has been a challenge to me for a long time. It's difficult for me to fake being interested in the way some people like to have introductory small talk. One person started talking to me by just saying the name of the city I live in and "huh?". Do you prefer the stock small talk questions about family and work?
Have you tried making the small talk large? Here's an example.
Random person: Chicago, huh?
You: Isn't it amazing that, in the vastness of the cosmos, in the endless primordial sea of burning stars and black holes, there exists a place called "Chicago"? What significance is there to that fact? Is there really a juxtaposition to be found? Is not Chicago itself an endless primordial sea inhabited by people, some of whom are are bright burning stars, and others dark, hungry black holes?
Random person: You're definitely not a cop. You wanna buy some drugs?
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:02 pm
(April 7, 2018 at 1:59 pm)J a c k Wrote: She- Damn Arizona weather, huh?
Me-Mmmmm yes. I love it when the heat digs into my rheumatoid aching body as I sit in my black car in 120F temperature for a whole two minutes before turning on the AC, and then my bones and my blood recuperating make me feel alive! For a second there I mistake relief with pleasure and then I happily praise our Arizona weather.
She: walks away.
Mission accomplished.
My friend has been diagnosed with RA just a year ago, and still hasn't found a way to manage the pain effectively. So hot weather helps? Unfortunately she lives in Ohio.
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
-walsh
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:04 pm
"How's your mother?"
"For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring." - Carl Sagan
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:06 pm
(This post was last modified: April 7, 2018 at 2:10 pm by rskovride.
Edit Reason: spelling
)
I'm not a fan of small talk either. I want to talk about space, what lies you have told, what your passions are, what songs give you chill bumps, religion (obviously), what would be done for a klondike bar, ever stolen anything, how did that make you feel, when was the last time you were scared....like truly elvis legged scared shitless, what makes your toes curl, technology and the meaning to life.
Screw the small talk, lets talk about the interesting stuff.
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:08 pm
(April 7, 2018 at 2:02 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: (April 7, 2018 at 1:59 pm)J a c k Wrote: She- Damn Arizona weather, huh?
Me-Mmmmm yes. I love it when the heat digs into my rheumatoid aching body as I sit in my black car in 120F temperature for a whole two minutes before turning on the AC, and then my bones and my blood recuperating make me feel alive! For a second there I mistake relief with pleasure and then I happily praise our Arizona weather.
She: walks away.
Mission accomplished.
My friend has been diagnosed with RA just a year ago, and still hasn't found a way to manage the pain effectively. So hot weather helps? Unfortunately she lives in Ohio. Dry, warm weather. I’m from Florida. It wasn’t working. Mom says I cried as a child all the time. We also lived in a beach house in Mexico for a while. It wasn’t great for my pain, either. I now live in the dry Arizona dessert and my knees, legs, arms... we’re loving it. When I leave a cold building and walk outside into the heat, I let the heat sink in before going back into the AC anywhere else. It feels like a massage.
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:12 pm
(April 7, 2018 at 2:08 pm)J a c k Wrote: (April 7, 2018 at 2:02 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: My friend has been diagnosed with RA just a year ago, and still hasn't found a way to manage the pain effectively. So hot weather helps? Unfortunately she lives in Ohio. Dry, warm weather. I’m from Florida. It wasn’t working. Mom says I cried as a child all the time. We also lived in a beach house in Mexico for a while. It wasn’t great for my pain, either. I now live in the dry Arizona dessert and my knees, legs, arms... we’re loving it. When I leave a cold building and walk outside into the heat, I let the heat sink in before going back into the AC anywhere else. It feels like a massage.
Do you do anything else to control the pain? Meds or anything? She tried Humera and it didn't work... 
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
-walsh
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:20 pm
(This post was last modified: April 7, 2018 at 2:21 pm by Whateverist.)
(April 7, 2018 at 1:46 pm)Bahana Wrote: This seems like an important concept in life to me. Not all that small. If I would have just said what I said at the start of this to someone in person it probably wouldn't have gone well.
Sounds like you should make it your objective to turn first conversations in a direction you find to be important enough to discuss. Of course the other person(s) may find that odd and decide to find a different person to talk to. But that is the beauty of it. By being more informative you give people the opportunity to sort themselves out of your life .. leaving room for those who are a better fit.
(April 7, 2018 at 1:56 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: I hate small talk
Well, except for poop, all your threads seem to pursue ideas of interest to you. I think that's a great quality.
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:22 pm
(April 7, 2018 at 2:12 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: (April 7, 2018 at 2:08 pm)J a c k Wrote: Dry, warm weather. I’m from Florida. It wasn’t working. Mom says I cried as a child all the time. We also lived in a beach house in Mexico for a while. It wasn’t great for my pain, either. I now live in the dry Arizona dessert and my knees, legs, arms... we’re loving it. When I leave a cold building and walk outside into the heat, I let the heat sink in before going back into the AC anywhere else. It feels like a massage.
Do you do anything else to control the pain? Meds or anything? She tried Humera and it didn't work...
Nope. I have a thing where I don’t like going to the doctor. Lol rozkek and others in slack know. I haven’t taken meds for this is years. Thing is that I don’t need it as much here. Sometimes my right knee disagrees, but it’s nothing that a sweater wrapped around it can’t handle. Now imagine me walking around in slacks and heels at work, but a sweater wrapped around my knee. Lol Oh, my wrist, too. I wrap sweaters around my knee and wrist. No wonder they think I’m odd at work.
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:25 pm
People on planes have the worst, absolutely most awful attempts at small talk. And why even attempt it? What the everlasting fuck makes you assume that, simply because we happen to be seated next to each other, there exists some sort of moral imperative that you engage me in some inane conversation for which I did not ask and clearly - because I'm reading a BOOK fer chrissakes - do not want?
And for the love of Mike, why, in the name of all that's pertinent, would you ask, 'Where are you headed?' It's a non-stop flight, you dimwitted bumhole - I'M GOING TO THE SAME PLACE YOU ARE!!!
jeezes pleezus.
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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RE: Making small talk more interesting
April 7, 2018 at 2:30 pm
(April 7, 2018 at 2:20 pm)Whateverist Wrote: (April 7, 2018 at 1:46 pm)Bahana Wrote: This seems like an important concept in life to me. Not all that small. If I would have just said what I said at the start of this to someone in person it probably wouldn't have gone well.
Sounds like you should make it your objective to turn first conversations in a direction you find to be important enough to discuss. Of course the other person(s) may find that odd and decide to find a different person to talk to. But that is the beauty of it. By being more informative you give people the opportunity to sort themselves out of your life .. leaving room for those who are a better fit.
(April 7, 2018 at 1:56 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: I hate small talk
Well, except for poop, all your threads seem to pursue ideas of interest to you. I think that's a great quality.
Hahaha!!! Yeah, but poop is like, scandalous talk. Not small talk. 
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
-walsh
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