Living in my own head lately...

[arewethereyet]

My older daughter has two best friends...I know...there can be only one but one is a woman she has know since they were about 11 (some 30 years ago) and the other is a man she has known nearly as long.  The man friend had a rough start to life and it's gotten better through hard work on his part.  Over the years he had three sons with an on again off again love and (much to my surprise) turned out to often be the better parent.  My daughter considers his sons as her nephews.  Geography has kept them apart but they have always been connected.

The two older boys were both firefighters...the younger of the two just since early this year.  Well, he took his own life this week.  At least that's how things appear though there will be some investigation done as there are some doubts as to the absolute declaration that suicide was the cause.

Either way, he was 21...he was just 21.  He had recently joined the county fire service following in the footsteps of his older brother.  

Though I haven't seen him since he was a small child I have known his father for decades.  My mind has been all over the place the last few days.  It seems I can't quite get my footing...21...so young.  My first husband died at 24, so much potential not realized.  To make it more unnerving, the father of this boy lives on the same road as the one my other daughter's best friend was murdered on just a few years back...a murder/suicide that rocked our family and still does.  They left 5 children behind...she was not yet 30.

My older daughter is there to support her friend.  The service is today with a full firefighter sendoff held at the high school where he excelled at sports just a couple short years ago.

Older daughter is unnerved as in the last eight years she was been back to SC three times...once for the aftermath of a murder/suicide, once to verify some suspicions regarding my younger daughter's addiction issues, and now for another possible suicide.

Rambling...I know I am rambling...I just needed to get some things out.


Life's short...you never know what people are dealing with and what might happen.

Let the people you love know it...today.  

sigh

[Gawdzilla Sama]

"Mental clearance! Everything must go!" I have a chute at the back of my head, just below the monkey brain. The people who live in my head periodically go through "the junk on my desk" and toss the unimportant, the handled, the absurd, and/or the stupid. The desk stays clear sometimes for days!

[Joods]

Hugs to you my friend.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

I tried living in my own head, but I couldn't stand the company.

Boru

[LastPoet]

I tried living in my own head, but I couldn't stand the company.

Boru

Yep. It keeps saying "go forth and massacre in the name of Zuul". Boring acually.

Angele <3.

[Deesse23]

[brewer]

Some people are not dealing with a full dick deck. 

I'll tell them that I care. I don't really understand love.

[outtathereligioncloset]

So, so sorry for your loss. And her loss. And their loss. I KNOW that for you and yours this is akin to losing a surrogate family member.

It's okay to live in your head for a while. Just don't start packing up baggage and moving in. Vent as needed. Scream if you want.

And no, there doesn't have to be only one best friend. When you're especially lucky in life you can have best friendS.

My heart goes out to all of you.

[Fireball]

Anjele.

[DodosAreDead]

I'm so sorry to hear that, anjele. For you, your daughter, her best friend, basically everyone affected. I hope you all feel better.