Do you care about your significant other's sexual past?

[Jenny A]

That they had a lot of sex, no, it's not something I care about.  No, wait, actually, I like a lot of sex, so it would be a recommendation of sorts. And a prudish background might give me a little concern, but it's pretty easy to try out whether that's a problem. 

What would concern me is a history of infidelity.  If you promise someone you only have sex with them and then cheat, chances are higher you'll do that again.  That would worry me, especially if I found out through a third party. To be clear, that's not the same as having multiple partners at once. As long as it's all above board, not a problem.

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Once upon a time I cared. 10 years later, I could care less as long as there's no diseases.

Which sort of leads into a discussion of cheating. There was a time when sexual intamacy and being "special" was extremely important to me. After my ex and I split, I dated a few girls who were all very nice and lovely, and each of them would have made good long-term partners. But something dawned on me, which was the idea that if they cheated on me, I wouldn't care, as long as it was safe, and no diseases were transmitted. At first I thought this was a reflection of how little I really cared for that person, how bonded I was, and I subsequently broke it off with many of them, but now I just think its an extension of having realistic expectations and ideals of what love means.

I'm still not confident that this is the right way to go about things, so I thought I'd air it out. If a woman was honest with me and wanted to have other sexual partners, I'd say go for it and get tested. Am I wrong in viewing this as an extension of being at peace with your partners past?

I think this is a very personal matter.  It matters to me that if I promise fidelity, I give it and that if I am promised fidelity I get it.  It's about integrity.

But I've had more than one partner at once.  It's just that I was open about it.  Honesty is important.