RE: Did you ever believe?
May 10, 2011 at 4:37 pm
(This post was last modified: May 10, 2011 at 4:39 pm by Welsh cake.)
Yes I once believed whole-heartedly. I invested so much time, life and emotion in that nonsense. Letting go of that conviction to a non-demonstrably proven deity and deconverting to the default position of non-belief was one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do.
We didn't get there in time. She was pronounced clinically dead an hour before we got there. I didn't put this "holier than thou god" to some silly test and hope she would magically recover, I'd lost two other close family members that same year from cancer, I knew death was inevitable, I just wanted to speak to her one last time, that was all. I'll never see or speak to her ever again... if there's really all powerful, all knowing god out there he's proven who the selfish bastard is quite nicely, all by himself too.
I now faced up to reality and realised it was no one's fault, the god I once loved, then hated, then was apathetic to didn't even exist. Traffic jams caused by accidents simply cannot be helped.
(May 10, 2011 at 1:41 pm)fr0d0 Wrote: I prayed for things as a kid. I knew nothing about God and wasn't a Christian as kids can be. None of my selfish prayers were answered.Except my last prayer before converting from theism to deism wasn't for selfish gain, it was simply for a mile-long traffic jam to clear faster so we could get to the hospital in time to see my beloved aunt once last time before she died of cancer.
We didn't get there in time. She was pronounced clinically dead an hour before we got there. I didn't put this "holier than thou god" to some silly test and hope she would magically recover, I'd lost two other close family members that same year from cancer, I knew death was inevitable, I just wanted to speak to her one last time, that was all. I'll never see or speak to her ever again... if there's really all powerful, all knowing god out there he's proven who the selfish bastard is quite nicely, all by himself too.
I now faced up to reality and realised it was no one's fault, the god I once loved, then hated, then was apathetic to didn't even exist. Traffic jams caused by accidents simply cannot be helped.
