'Saved' from Myself

[Owlix]

I just can't get past the fact that they're WRONG! I can't prove they are but that doesn't mean I don't know they are.

It's like when I'm watching a movie with friends or family and that person says "oh that's this actor". I say "no, it's not" they say, "well who is it then?" I say "I don't remember at the moment but I'm telling you I know it's not the guy you think it is, he was in this movie and that movie... the guy here ISN'T that actor" and everyone doubts because I can't tell them who it is, I just know who it Isn't.

Argh. When I know I'm right I just feel a need to display my evidence. By which point most others have lost interest and moved onto another subject so that when I bring said evidence, they're always like "oh, are we still on that?" Fuck yes we're still on that because I know I'm right and I need you to admit it!

So that's where I'm at right now.

I am certain in my heart of hearts, My mind of minds, my rationale, common sense, with every fiber of my being, that God and gods are not real. Can I prove it? No. Which sucks.

But I am learning to just drop it and let people be uneducated and ignorant (I try to be more understanding but I just can't. The sky is blue, most grass is green, plants breathe CO2 in and exhale oxygen. And if you think otherwise you need to open your eyes.)

A few weeks back, I was out with a friend and the subject of god came up for the first time. I said, 'no, I don't believe in god' and she said, 'oh yeah, I have a few other friends that are satanists...'. I said 'well, I don't worship him either....' and the conversation just faded away. Maybe it's easiest to do that.