Problems with the theory of evolution.

[CleanShavenJesus]

^ I was going to take her seriously at first, but when the mods said her IP was in Canada, I figured it was a troll.

Ladies and gentlemen, nothing to see here. Please do not feed the troll.

Not only a little? Because here comes the choo-choo train, open wide! I want to feed this fugly with green gunk until it explodes!

No! Don't feed them! It'll eat you...then it's gonna eat me!

OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

[Doubting Thomas]

[Psykhronic]

You know guys, though part of me wanted to say troll too, I didn't immediately go there, because if you think about it, many of us probably know someone who would say a few of these things unironically. Given how much we shake our heads sadly at childhood indoctrination and such, I'd be surprised if this was entirely out of our sphere of experience.

I was talking to Luckie about it earlier this morning, and she was pretty convinced the OP was sincere, based on the fact that at one point in her own education all she had were those same strawmen and religiously motivated shards of misinformation to go off of. And she grew out of it.

Ask yourselves: do we really want to scare off a theist that would be this much fun?

FFFUUU - you're right. People do believe a lot of bullshit and this thread has so much humor potential.

[LostLocke]

Ok guys, let's make a pool: Is she a hit and run, or will she come back? And in case she comes back, will she whine about how mean atheists are or will she continue to troll? Place your bets, place your bets! The winner gets 1000 Internets!

I bet potato!!

[jamie_russels]

The sun loses 400 Million tons every second in this process, thus it is burning constantly and will eventually putter out like stars do that we are able to observe in the final stage of their existence.

Could this be proof that God created our sun with an "expiration date"? You know, like how it talks about the 'end times' in the bible.

EDIT: If you're actually from Alabama, what are you doing in Vancouver, Canada..? Trolling, perhaps?

I'm here for two weeks visiting family, using their WiFi.

Okay, so first of all, welcome on board. Second, and I don't mean to be insulting, but are you for real? We in the online atheist community are pretty used to being trolled, is that what you're doing?

Yes. I don't understand what 'troll' or 'trolling' or 'trolled' or 'Poe' means. Is this some kind of scientist slang? These terms keep getting thrown around and I don't understand what they mean.

I think you are confusing abiogenesis and evolution.

That's another word I've seen since reading these forums. Abiogenesis. Now if the bible is supposedly false, why are you people using the word 'genesis' in a scientific theory?

Because we also give back all that water we take in, in form of breath, sweat, piss and shit. Think about that the next time you take a drink - the water you are drinking right now was probably in some guy's piss a few thousand years ago.

There is no need for rude language. Also, if the water we're drinking is urine then why is it clear? And why doesn't it taste bad? So many people have existed, they have excreted waste into water and bathed in it for thousands of years, so how does water "recycle itself". I remember when me and my brother were kids we went on vacation and he left poo in the toilet and forgot to flush because we were in a hurry to leave. And let me tell you, when we returned one week later that water didn't magically clean itself. It was still there like it was when we left.

But I bet you believe in the Genesis 2 story where God created Adam from a pile of dust, don't you?

Well these scientists are saying we come from stardust. Who's to say that "dust" mentioned in the bible isn't the stardust that scientists are always talking about? Maybe they inadvertently proved some of the bible there, huh?

Oh my fucking god, someone please tell me this is a poe or troll.

Please don't blaspheme. Don't bring God into it. If you have a problem with anything I say address me

I am as cynical about human intelligence as they come, and even I refuse to believe that anyone could be this stupid.

Please try to keep this fair and don't insult me. I'm not insulting anybody. Those are ad hominem attacks. Lets just try to have a civil discussion.

Over the weekend, my father-in-law cut his finger and had to go to the emergency room. There was a lady there who brought in her child because he had gone swimming and may have gotten water in his ear.

Yes, human stupidity is boundless.

I hope your father-in-law is okay. I'll send a prayer for his speedy healing. You shouldn't call him stupid though. We all have accidents from time to time.

Even granting your ridiculous calculations, your interpretation of them relies on humans drinking water three billion years ago. Raise your hand if you can spot the deliberate mistake. Anyone?

I didn't make a deliberate mistake. I don't know what you're implying, but my point was that human beings can't have existed very long at all because all the water would have been used up by now. And of course human beings weren't drinking water three billion years ago. We've only been here 5,000-6,000 years.

Sorry it took me so long to reply. I made my post last night right before I went to sleep. I haven't addressed all the replies yet but I will when I have time to read over them more thoroughly.

[Faith No More]

You know guys, though part of me wanted to say troll too, I didn't immediately go there, because if you think about it, many of us probably know someone who would say a few of these things unironically. Given how much we shake our heads sadly at childhood indoctrination and such, I'd be surprised if this was entirely out of our sphere of experience.

Like Stimbo said, this is all too neat and pretty. It hits all the right notes of Creationist cliches except for "I don't come from no monkey." There may very well be people that believe this, but how many of them do you think would come and present it to us in such a manner?

It reeks of manufacturing.

ETA: Oh, fuck me.

[Bad Writer]

You see the expression on my Avatar's face? That's how I actually look right now.

I did want to comment on the observation about the rock, and the obvious strawman that wags its burlap nose at us. I mean, sure, if all matter evolves into intelligent life, why are the still rocks? That same down-syndrome logic can be applied to anything that has evolved! Look:

If we evolved from monkeys, why are there still apes?
If Americans came from Great Britain, why are there still Brits?
If Rock n' Roll emerged from the Blues, then why did Jimi Hendrix write "Red House"?
If English is a Germanic language, why do people still speak German and Dutch?

And a merry Herp Derp to you too!

[Faith No More]

Exhibit A that this is bullshit.

Yes. I don't understand what 'troll' or 'trolling' or 'trolled' or 'Poe' means. Is this some kind of scientist slang? These terms keep getting thrown around and I don't understand what they mean.

I mean, seriously? Tone it down if you want people to think you're for real.

[Kayenneh]

It's pretty amazing that a Great Old One can be foiled by something as simple as human stupidity if you think about it.

Huh.. And here I thought this thread was an ode to thoughtlessness

Ask yourselves: do we really want to scare off a theist that would be this much fun?

If I'm wrong and she is indeed sincere, she still has some explaining to do. You just don't come around saying that something is 'silly' or 'I don't understand', but then continue to ridicule without avail that which is beyond your comprehension. If she is an Alabaman baptist, I would love to hear what she has to say about all the debunking.

EDIT: Yeah, nevermind, she's TSTL if sincere

[Psykhronic]

There is no need for rude language. Also, if the water we're drinking is urine then why is it clear? And why doesn't it taste bad? So many people have existed, they have excreted waste into water and bathed in it for thousands of years, so how does water "recycle itself". I remember when me and my brother were kids we went on vacation and he left poo in the toilet and forgot to flush because we were in a hurry to leave. And let me tell you, when we returned one week later that water didn't magically clean itself. It was still there like it was when we left.

*sigh

Alright, which one of us is going to explain this to her?

/cigarette