Just ugh!

[BrokenQuill92]

So I totally think men and women can be just friends. When I offer somebody genuine friendship I think it's small and shallow of you to turn up your nose because I've decided you're not my type sexually. A man is not entitled to my body just because they're "nice". Just ugh! I'm so sick of this attitude from a portion of the male population.







Until this video I really liked Cult of Dusty.

[pineapplebunnybounce]

Couldn't finish that video.

I hate guys who go around saying they're nice as if that means girls owe it to them to have sex with them. If you're one of these guys and wondering why girls don't want to be with you, it's because you think the only worthy reward for being nice to a girl is sex.

[TaraJo]

"Entitled to sex" feels a whole fuck of a lot like a strawman. I don't think Dusty said it once in that video (I watched it yesterday). In fact, I don't think I've heard anyone say they felt entitled to sex, except maybe a few douchebags who are better off ignored. For the most part, it seems to be either limited to a heavy minority of men or the words are twisted and manipulated into meaning something totally different from what was actually said; either way, I call bullshit.

When I have heard guys complain about being friendzoned, it usually falls under one of two categories. I've seen both of these happen quite a bit (especially in high school):

1) Guys who feel like the girl is manipulating him via the crush he has on her without ever actually dating her
2) Guys who are actually good, decent, respectful people who are sick and tired of the object of their affection coming to them to complain about the douchebag guys they keep dating

Me, I think either one of those two guys has legitimate complaints.

On another note, he also stated that if she isn't into you, just move on because it's better off for both of you. Again, I think that's good advice.

[My imaginary friend is GOD]

It's another example of the patriarchy at work. I admit, I find most of my friends attractive, but I'm not expecting that if I'm nice enough to them they will eventually reward me with sex. Although, that has happened. My friends are more sexually liberated than most.

[pineapplebunnybounce]

"If you don't pick the guys who worship the ground you walk on [...], then fuck you, you deserve whatever shitty treatment you get from the assholes you pick"

Paraphrasing cos i wasn't typing as he's saying it. If that's not entitlement I don't know what is.

[Tartarus Sauce]

Huh? I was always under the impression that every guy knew you DON'T get out of the friendzone. What's with this whole "entitlement to sex" deal? I think that's a major distortion of what guys usually mean when they say they get "friendzoned." I've never seen it as a statement in which they feel they have been robbed of any entitlement, just that they won't get the opportunity.

And for the record, girls can get friendzoned too.

[FlyingNarwhal]

I know I'm not entitled to your body, that is very clear to me and men in general for the most part. But women need to understand that they are not entitled to our friendship either. If I'm interested in you or just plain want to fuck you, I'm not going to hang around to shake the hands of other guys that are going to because you want to be friends. The same as I wouldn't expect you (who just wants to be friends) to blow me because that's what I want.

[TaraJo]

I'm gonna tell a little story here.

See, a while back, after I saw the first Hunger Games movie, I decided to go online to see what I could find out about it. To me, the movie had a strong message about the 'haves' fucing over the 'have-nots.' However, I also knew that right-wing sources, always going on about class warefare, wouldn't put up with that. Sure enough, their focus was on a corrupt government oppressing its people. And, you know what? I can totally see where both of those ideas would come from.

So, why am I telling that story? Simple: the movie is up for individual interpretation. In fact, everything is kinda up for interpretation. What one person may interprete as good, another may interprete as bad.

And I think this applies to the concept of friendzoning and Dusty's video. Yes, there's certainly an interpretation that's horribly misogynistic and rude and wrong. There's also an interpretation that totally isn't. Me, I tend to try to see the positives in people and I try to assume the best when it's reasonable and possible; at least until proven otherwise.

---

"If you don't pick the guys who worship the ground you walk on [...], then fuck you, you deserve whatever shitty treatment you get from the assholes you pick"

Paraphrasing cos i wasn't typing as he's saying it. If that's not entitlement I don't know what is.

So, if a rich guy, who's well fed is complaining to a poor, starving man about how terrible his food is, do you think that's kinda a douchebag move? Or should the poor guy be shamed for having a sense of entitlement?

[Autumnlicious]

It's another example of the patriarchy at work. I admit,

That is the most bullshit and lazy headed excuse of an explanation I've seen all day.

I observed something similar to this pathetic mess last night - turns out that many men and women have no idea how to even talk to the opposite sex.

They're sold ridiculous fantasies that ended up characterizing our tropes - it is much more common to find in the media, our discussions and even our casual stories of our relationships that love simply happens, as if it was born within a vacuum.

You want to understand where men and women and up getting these ridiculous views of "entitled to sex"? Views on the "proper way to do things"?

Sadly it's not just within popular culture.

Did you know you could get a divorce simply based on the fact that you or the other does not have enough sex in the marriage?

It seems intellectually lazy to blame it on "patriarchy".

When you're swamped in a culture of unhealthy relationships, bad behaviors, and unrealistic expectations without even the understanding to talk with another, blaming it upon some buzzword is of the greatest disservice to the understanding of each component and hinders discussion to move forward. How can we focus upon teaching each other?

It's very much like someone desperately attempting to get the last word in an argument and ending up poisoning the entire relationship because "they had to win".

You want to know why I find issues with both self-described men's rights activists and so-called feminists?

Because it is boiled down to a pissing match between extremists on either side, absolutely joyous to label and the deride with their special terminology.

And we all lose.

In the end run there will be lots of men and women living very unhappy lives without even the slightest clue how to engage the opposite sex in a decent discussion... And get to know the other like a human being.

But hey! We can always blame it on the buzzword instead of the myriad sources of bad information, habits, and teachings!

Right!

[Tea Earl Grey Hot]

It's another example of the patriarchy at work. I admit, I find most of my friends attractive, but I'm not expecting that if I'm nice enough to them they will eventually reward me with sex. Although, that has happened. My friends are more sexually liberated than most.

Really?! I need to brush up on biology.