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joke time
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How do you get a nun pregnant?
Dress her up as an altar boy.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
 RE: joke time
September 1, 2014 at 9:13 pm
(This post was last modified: September 1, 2014 at 9:17 pm by The Valkyrie.)
(September 1, 2014 at 9:12 pm)Zack Wrote: I know a guy that was in a really bad wreck that left the left side of his body paralyzed. He's all right now. I actually use this one occasionally. If someone asks me if I'm alright, I answer that no, I'm half left.  (September 1, 2014 at 9:12 pm)Stimbo Wrote: How do you get a nun pregnant? A great quote from Blackadder - paraphrased. Blackadder has been made the archbishop of Canterbury. "So, how can we make money from this?" Baldrick, " . . .selling the sexual favours of nuns . . ." "SELLING the sexual favours of nuns? You mean people actually pay for them?" Baldrick, "Yes. Foreign businessmen. Other nuns . . . "
Dying to live, living to die.
RE: joke time
September 1, 2014 at 9:17 pm
(This post was last modified: September 1, 2014 at 10:50 pm by Cyberman.)
My Sam's nan always used to say that to me.
(Edit for clarity: the "half left" thing, not nun's sexual favours.)
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
The state can be swapped out with whomever. Hoosiers just like to pick on Kentucky.
Why don't Kentuckians drink Kool Aid? They can't figure out how to get a gallon of water into one of those little pouches. What do you do when a Kentuckian throws a pin at you? Run like hell. They have a grenade between their teeth.
I used to be in a band called Fat Bastards.
We went through a stage.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
A virgin in NZ:
Any sheep that can outrun a New Zealander . . .
Dying to live, living to die.
I couldn't believe it when Shell turned the TV off while I was watching it. I looked at the blank screen and thought to myself, "That's just not on".
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
 Quote: Mohammed spent a lot of time up mountains, slaying goats and raping children, 
Q: What's white and shoots across the sky?
A: The coming of the Lord. Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
An ugly, old drunk walks up to a beautiful and sophisticated woman in a bar and says,' excuse me miss, can I smell your cunt.'
Disgusted, the woman hisses,' no, you most certainly cannot.' 'Hmm, it must be your feet then', he said. |
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