Body shaming, and "My Big Fat Fabulous Life"

[BrokenQuill92]

Most of my problem with people bitching about the body acceptance movement is this: Men's big and tall clothing usually cost either the same or on a few dollars more than straight sizes and yet they still get same quality of material. As a girl struggling with weight loss why do my clothes cost ten, twenty dollars more, some stores double the price. And then they're made of shit material? And don't give that bigger body= more cloth excuse because men don't go through this. Not only that when I must venture into plus clothing, everything is fucking UGLY!!!!!! So while I'm trying to get healthy, I have to look ugly? I'm not supposed to have pretty colors? Nice dresses? Sexy clothes?

[account_inactive]

Most of my problem with people bitching about the body acceptance movement is this: Men's big and tall clothing usually cost either the same or on a few dollars more than straight sizes and yet they still get same quality of material. As a girl struggling with weight loss why do my clothes cost ten, twenty dollars more, some stores double the price. And then they're made of shit material? And don't give that bigger body= more cloth excuse because men don't go through this. Not only that when I must venture into plus clothing, everything is fucking UGLY!!!!!! So while I'm trying to get healthy, I have to look ugly? I'm not supposed to have pretty colors? Nice dresses? Sexy clothes?

Uh, yes they do.

[bennyboy]

I gotta say. . . my wife is a thin and smallish Korean woman. She's a hot piece of ass, don't get me wrong. But sometimes I fantasize about going on an adult ride once in a while.

I think women have to wake up to the fact that ALL women are body-shamed. They're too fat, too thin, too tall, too short, and if they are none of those things-- they're fucking bitches. But over there, in the corner behind the curtain, is the entire male half of the species, bunch of pot-bellied balding trolls that we are, drooling and jerking off to all that wonderful variety.

Women's weakness, and where they shame each other, is pretty obviously a struggle for self-validation: if THAT girl's a fucking hippo, nobody's gonna care about my bony knees. If THAT girl's as flat as a board, my curves are an improvement. If THAT girl's a slutty whore, then the fact that I haven't been laid in three years is a virtue.

The solution would be for all women to realize that they pretty much have the power of selection over almost all men. It could be the world's biggest guild.

But lucky for us men that women are too spiteful ever to stand with more than about 3 other women at a time without pulling out the claws!

[CapnAwesome]

Women like to make this a problem with men but I don't think that's it at all. Lots of men love fat women. There are tons of them. I hear far more men talk about wanting to be with big girls then I hear any fat shaming. It's not a problem with women either. Maybe a girl will say something catty about a fat girl behind her back, but I'm friends with tons of women and I never hear it. Also fat men feel like shit just as much as fat women.

The reason that fat people feel like shit is because everything is more difficult for them. Moving around is more difficult. You are extremely limited in what you can do with your life if you are even 50 or 30 lbs overweight. You are going to feel like shit and be depressed because you can't exercise and use your body as we were evolved to use them. It's not how human beings were for 99.9 percent of history. It's also a cycle. If I had to wear a 50 lb weight vest all the time, I'd probably sit around a lot more too. So in that sense I don't think it's fair to call fat people lazy. Thin people would be just as lazy if everything were as difficult for them.

But the body acceptance movement totally ignores this. Healthy at any size is a lie. Even if someone is 'Healthy' in the sense they aren't at immediate risk of dying, it doesn't mean they are capable. It's not 'fat shaming' that makes people feel like shit, it's being fat. So ironically I think this movement hurts the obese far more then it helps.

[brewer]

I gotta say. . . my wife is a thin and smallish Korean woman.  She's a hot piece of ass, don't get me wrong.  But sometimes I fantasize about going on an adult ride once in a while.
[edit]

This?



If yes, you have more self confidence than I.

[GrandizerII]

But the body acceptance movement totally ignores this. Healthy at any size is a lie. Even if someone is 'Healthy' in the sense they aren't at immediate risk of dying, it doesn't mean they are capable. It's not 'fat shaming' that makes people feel like shit, it's being fat. So ironically I think this movement hurts the obese far more then it helps.

It's not about perception of health. It's about acceptance. Esteem, love, respect, support, kindness, empathy. It's about fighting prejudice against people who happen to be overweight. It's about  less stress and more psychological relief for people who don't fall within the socially acceptable weight range but feel trapped and psychologically unable to get into that range.

[CapnAwesome]

But the body acceptance movement totally ignores this. Healthy at any size is a lie. Even if someone is 'Healthy' in the sense they aren't at immediate risk of dying, it doesn't mean they are capable. It's not 'fat shaming' that makes people feel like shit, it's being fat. So ironically I think this movement hurts the obese far more then it helps.

It's not about perception of health. It's about acceptance. Esteem, love, respect, support, kindness, empathy. It's about fighting prejudice against people who happen to be overweight. It's about  less stress and more psychological relief for people who don't fall within the socially acceptable weight range but feel trapped and psychologically unable to get into that range.

All of that happens anyway. I don't know a fat person who isn't loved or respected or been kind too. People saying that isn't happening are passing the blame for why they feel like shit. Fat people feel like shit, not because they aren't loved or empathized with. They feel like shit because they are fat and it impairs their ability to live a good life.

Edit: Also if you haven't heard 'healthy at any size' as part of the body acceptance movement, you haven't paid that close of attention. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Health_at_Every_Size

As part of the wider fat acceptance movement,[8][9] HAES includes also a significant social and psychological dimension. Proponents view the common wisdom that obesity is unhealthy as part of a general stigmatization of the obese, and especially of obese women; thus, the movement has furthermore strong connections with feminism.

[bennyboy]

I gotta say. . . my wife is a thin and smallish Korean woman.  She's a hot piece of ass, don't get me wrong.  But sometimes I fantasize about going on an adult ride once in a while.
[edit]

This?



If yes, you have more self confidence than I.

I don't mind going elbow-deep if I have to-- I'm generous that way!  Assuming that's not a tranny, I'd be in like Flynn. I'm not short, but I have pretty short legs-- stand-up doggy style sounds like a thing I'd like to do!

[bennyboy]

It's not about perception of health. It's about acceptance. Esteem, love, respect, support, kindness, empathy. It's about fighting prejudice against people who happen to be overweight. It's about  less stress and more psychological relief for people who don't fall within the socially acceptable weight range but feel trapped and psychologically unable to get into that range.

All of that happens anyway. I don't know a fat person who isn't loved or respected or been kind too. People saying that isn't happening are passing the blame for why they feel like shit. Fat people feel like shit, not because they aren't loved or empathized with. They feel like shit because they are fat and it impairs their ability to live a good life.

Edit: Also if you haven't heard 'healthy at any size' as part of the body acceptance movement, you haven't paid that close of attention. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Health_at_Every_Size

The problem is that it's a circle, and fat-shaming feeds it, and for really no good reason. Telling someone "Get a grip on yourself. I mean, fuck, you have a choice," etc. is going to make someone feel powerless and unpleasant, and this will lead to escape in the form of food enjoyment.

[Bob Kelso]

Most of my problem with people bitching about the body acceptance movement is this: Men's big and tall clothing usually cost either the same or on a few dollars more than straight sizes and yet they still get same quality of material. As a girl struggling with weight loss why do my clothes cost ten, twenty dollars more, some stores double the price. And then they're made of shit material? And don't give that bigger body= more cloth excuse because men don't go through this. Not only that when I must venture into plus clothing, everything is fucking UGLY!!!!!! So while I'm trying to get healthy, I have to look ugly? I'm not supposed to have pretty colors? Nice dresses? Sexy clothes?

My just shy of 7' tall uncle paid larger sums of money than I did in my teen/adult years for some of the same clothes -we have similar taste- and it was because he was bloody larger. It is what it is. Saying don't give me "x" when "x" is either the reason or a contributing factor isn't going to work.