How does one stay sane in a religious environment and/or family?

[The Skeptic]

So, this past weekend I went wit my family to visit my grandmother. Don't get me wrong, I care about my grandmother, but she really irritated me. She lives in North Carolina, and being an old southerner, is rather religious. I don't know if I just never noticed before or if she was more vocal this time, but she was rather prejudiced towards homosexuals, african-americans, and non-Christians. It was annoying the hell out of me, but I just kept my mouth shut and waited to go home. My father is no better. In fact, he's worse. Unfortunately, I live with my parents still and my father is currently taking online classes at Liberty University to get a Master's degree in some theological crap. I live in a highly religious community as well.

My point to all this is , is this: Who else feels overwhelmed by their religious surroundings? Usually, it's not too hard just to live your life, but sometimes all the crap just gets shoved down your throat. We atheists often criticize the religious for being bigoted, but sometimes they themselves make it exceedingly difficult not to hate them, and for family, not want to visit them. I'm aware that there are far more religous communities and families out there, so, How do you all deal with these sorts of situations?

[ozgoat]

I can see the dilemma here!

Fortunately, I only know one religious person, my oldest friend. He became AOG(Pentecostal) a number of years ago and then a pastor. We only communicate on the 'phone these days and I found I had to set some ground rules!

In addition to being a Pentecostal pastor, he is homophobic, racist, misogynistic and I sometimes wonder why I'm still friends with him!

Some years ago he began preaching to me and I very quickly let him know that I was an atheist, but if he wanted to believe then that was his choice. He told me that he was concerned for my soul because I was an atheist, I replied that I was concerned for his sanity because he wasn't. He had previously mentioned that god had sat alongside him in his truck!

So, while I have no answers for you, I realise to some extent what you have to suffer when listening to people whose views are entirely different to you own.

[The Skeptic]

It's not so much the fact that I live in a Christian area that bugs me as the fact that in the Carolinas Christianity is often part of the "package" along with racism, homophobia, and so forth. I imagine i'd be just as unhappy in an area filled with hateful atheists as well.

[Minimalist]

in the Carolinas Christianity is often part of the "package" along with racism, homophobia, and so forth.

Yup.








It's in the blood.

[binny]

I understand how you feel. Luckily for me my parents, although not atheists, didn't buy into that religious horse shit. So I wasn't around it much when I was young. Except when we visited the super religious relatives. I was told to behave and keep my mouth shut. It didn't bother me much to be around them. I ignored anything stupid they may have said. That was a long time ago and they are long since dead. Now that I'm older I feel sometimes it's harder to deal with the insanity of the super religious around me. I have a crazy Jesus freak nephew who doesn't even masturbate. There is a church on every corner. The Kmart down the street closed up and what went in it's place? In big black letters that you can see a mile away 'LIVING HOPE CHURCH'. God how I hate living here sometimes. Frankly I'm not sure how I put up with it. I guess I just do my best to ignore what I can. Being here helps. I haven't been around much and I can tell. I'm a bit mental.
Not sure I answered your question. Just hang in there. Things will get better...someday.

---

Min, I love your quote. Priceless!

[Nitsuj]

I have to go to a catholic school, so I'm surrounded by this shit for 7 hours a day, 5 days a week. I get by by saying to myself that I'm smarter than these Jesus freaks, that I believe in truth and reality, not fairy tales. It can be hard. For example, every first Friday of the month, we have to go to Eucharistic Adoration. (It's a good time for a nap), and every Friday we have to go to church. (There's a built in chapel in our school) I don't get communion, though. My friends are always challenging my views, and it's funny to hear what they come up with. "How was the world created?" I don't know that, but I'm sure some magic man didn't do it. We don't know everything yet. These kids think we do. Theology class isn't as bad as you might think, actually. All we've been doing is reading books of the bible, taking notes, and taking quizzes. It'll probably get worse in the next few years. (I'm a freshman) because they're going to try to convince me of crap such as that life begins at conception, and make me answer that on a test. Other things they do is ask shit like "How does God help you in your daily life?" "What can you do to be more holy?" etc. Somehow, I've gotten through this year with a B in Theology. Anyway, back to topic. Just roll your eyes a lot, try to be strong. You're right, they're wrong. And you can always find solace and support here!

[leo-rcc]

I guess if I am to believe Geert Wilders I will find out in about 5-10 years when the Netherlands has become a Muslim country with Sharia law. Until then I don't really have a problem here.

[BlackUnicorn]

I am dealing with the reverse, a non-religious, non-practicing family becoming more religious as a result of being near the religious. I have to say the horror I found discovering Mary on my parents calendar and Desktop monitor. But as long as they aren't going to church (and are adverse to doing so) that is tolerable, yet disturbing that they are starting to believe there is a 'god out there'. Had a conversation in a restaurant with my father a year back, and he claimed there was something in Christianity and other religions, of course there is not but what can one do. I guess I have to count my blessings I was born into vaguely religious family, when I was growing up. Yet tragically Atheist/Agnostic/Irreligious literature was lacking and I had to buy my own.

[Edwardo Piet]

I wonder if it's possible to try and imagine yourself being as bigoted as them, in order to empathize, that might help you put up with them maybe.

[OnlyNatural]

He told me that he was concerned for my soul because I was an atheist, I replied that I was concerned for his sanity because he wasn't.

Nice Now I know what to say next time someone wants to save my soul.

My family isn't religious, but my future family-in-law is VERY Catholic. All my boyfriend and I can do is keep our damn heathen mouths shut, as it is impossible to reason with them. And we avoid them as much as possible. They don't 'believe' in evolution, are very racist and prejudiced, all that good stuff...