They did.

Yup, I'm so cool you could keep a side of beef in me for a week. So hip, I have trouble seeing over my pelvis

Also, did someone say drunk hairy Brit?

You've done me like a kipper there

Woooooooahhhhhhhhh

But then you'd never be able to post anything :p

you guys need to install a retard shield

Hey, I'm not hairy

Or we could just let a drunk, hairy brit come up with the backstory...

It's ok, I've worked it out. The Thing comes from the same planet as the Hagunemnon whose genetic structure is based on the quadrupole sterated octo helix which is so chronically unstable that, while sitting for lunch, if they are unable to reach a coffee spoon they are likely, without a moments consideration, to mutate into something with much longer arms but is probably quite incapable of drinking the coffee...

The Thing does not integrate. It destroys and remakes.

Sarlacc just integrated the personality of it's victims into itself

Sarlacc << The Thing. Thing is fucking scary, because it would consume it's prey

Sarlacc and The Thing = Facebook ^^

A frightening prospect to not only be devoured by become part of something bigger, a living breathing collective

Sort of like the Sarlacc, where it incorporates its prey into its own body

or so the conjecture to how such a vector could exist

to it's own

the assimilation part would involve consuming of prey cells, with the additional goody of being able to process and append with appropriate cues the preys genetic structure