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The "miracle" of Hanukkah
#1
The "miracle" of Hanukkah
We are now in the Hanukkah season. At this time Jewish people celebrate a "miracle".... an occasioon when a one day supply of oil miraculously lasted for EIGHT DAYS!

Is this the lamest "miracle" ever? You mean to tell me that, instead of doing something that will actually help people, your deity wastes his incredible powers by making oil burn longer than it should?

Gee, I'm impressed!

This is a trick not even worthy of a third rate magician!

And this is THE ONLY POSSIBLE explanation for why the oil lasted for 8 days? Isn't it more likely that they simply miscalculated how much oil they had? Or that they set the lamp to burn very slowly, making the oil last longer? Or that someone added more oil to the lamp without telling anybody?

No! Obviously it was the work of God!

What is your opinion of this "miracle"? And can you think of a dumber supposed "miracle"?
Science flies us to the moon and stars. Religion flies us into buildings.

God allowed 200,000 people to die in an earthquake. So what makes you think he cares about YOUR problems?
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#2
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
If Christians can make a 3 hours of bullshit go on for 2000 years, what's so miraculous about 1 day's oil lasting a mere 8 days?
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#3
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
It's a very minor holiday, but people blow it out of proportion because of its proximity to Christmas.

Also, never underestimate the power of Jews to come up with a holiday in which we have to eat a scrumptious food to "remember". Latkes are the real reason that holiday stays afloat (they're fried in oil, oil relating to the miracle, har-dee-har-har). I'm making some tomorrow. Wanna come over? Smile

Don't analyze the bullshit, just understand the formula that pretty much all Jewish holidays follow: Someone oppressed us (allegedly in some cases), somehow we overcame it, OKAY LET'S EAT!! Stick with the eating part.
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#4
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
Quote:your deity wastes his incredible powers by making oil burn longer than it should?


The oil companies would have him whacked if he tried that shit now.
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#5
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
(December 2, 2010 at 12:37 pm)Minimalist Wrote:
Quote:your deity wastes his incredible powers by making oil burn longer than it should?


The oil companies would have him whacked if he tried that shit now.

That's why he bestirred himself to effect another miracle and caused the Interpol put out a warrant on Cheney.
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#6
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
(December 2, 2010 at 12:35 pm)thesummerqueen Wrote: It's a very minor holiday, but people blow it out of proportion because of its proximity to Christmas.

In my area the Jewish community makes a big deal out of putting up a giant menorah on public property. Of course, I don't think it belongs there and there was a bit of a controversy when they first erected it until the local court said it was okay. You can see the local paper's article here: http://www.poughkeepsiejournal.com/artic...he-Walkway

Quote:Also, never underestimate the power of Jews to come up with a holiday in which we have to eat a scrumptious food to "remember". Latkes are the real reason that holiday stays afloat (they're fried in oil, oil relating to the miracle, har-dee-har-har). I'm making some tomorrow. Wanna come over? Smile

Never eaten a Latke. What's it taste like?

Quote:Don't analyze the bullshit, just understand the formula that pretty much all Jewish holidays follow: Someone oppressed us (allegedly in some cases), somehow we overcame it, OKAY LET'S EAT!! Stick with the eating part.

Sounds a lot like how my wife's Italian family approaches a holiday.

Science flies us to the moon and stars. Religion flies us into buildings.

God allowed 200,000 people to die in an earthquake. So what makes you think he cares about YOUR problems?
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#7
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
(December 2, 2010 at 1:03 pm)Thor Wrote: In my area the Jewish community makes a big deal out of putting up a giant menorah on public property.

I suppose we all have to find a way to get through the winter. I was raised in a conservative temple and they always downplayed it, except for the little kids. They told me the orthodox don't even exchange gifts. [shrugs]

(December 2, 2010 at 1:03 pm)Thor Wrote: Never eaten a Latke. What's it taste like?

It's sort of like hashbrowns - shredded potatoes that you allow to drain of the starches and then you bind them together with egg and matzo meal and any other thing you'd like to add...shredded apples, onions, herbs, etc. Then you fry them. It's glorious. Depending on what you put in them, you can put applesauce or powdered sugar or sour cream on top.

(December 2, 2010 at 1:03 pm)Thor Wrote: Sounds a lot like how my wife's Italian family approaches a holiday.

It's the only sensible way to approach a family gathering, in my experience. When you're too busy eating, there isn't enough time for drama.
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#8
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
Quote:It's the only sensible way to approach a family gathering, in my experience. When you're too busy eating, there isn't enough time for drama.

And the food soaks up some of the alcohol.



You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.

Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.




 








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#9
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
(December 2, 2010 at 1:41 pm)downbeatplumb Wrote: And the food soaks up some of the alcohol.

Too true, my dear.
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#10
RE: The "miracle" of Hanukkah
(December 2, 2010 at 1:18 pm)thesummerqueen Wrote: [quote='Thor' pid='107692' dateline='1291309436']
Never eaten a Latke. What's it taste like?

Quote:It's sort of like hashbrowns - shredded potatoes that you allow to drain of the starches and then you bind them together with egg and matzo meal and any other thing you'd like to add...shredded apples, onions, herbs, etc. Then you fry them. It's glorious. Depending on what you put in them, you can put applesauce or powdered sugar or sour cream on top.

Sounds like they could be yummy.... depending on what you toss into the mixture. I'm sure some people make a concoction that my dog wouldn't touch.

Quote:It's the only sensible way to approach a family gathering, in my experience. When you're too busy eating, there isn't enough time for drama.

And boy, can her family eat! Especially the teenage nephews!
Science flies us to the moon and stars. Religion flies us into buildings.

God allowed 200,000 people to die in an earthquake. So what makes you think he cares about YOUR problems?
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