Grimm Fairy Tales are Fucked Up

[Epimethean]

Cinderella (Aschenputtel) fun:

[Aschenputtel] Attends all 3 nights of the feast, transformed. On the 1st and 2nd night: Dances with the Prince all night exclusively. His comment to other suitors is ‘The Lady is dancing with me’. Prince wants to walk her home both nights but she runs away from him. 1st night, hides in pigeon house 2nd night, hides in pear tree. Prince follows and gets her father to look for her both times but they find nothing. 3rd night – Aschenputtel dances exclusively with the prince again. He is determined not to lose her and makes the stairs sticky to slow her down. Doesn’t catch her but does get her slipper.

Prince declares he will marry the lady who fits the slipper.

Sister 1 tries on shoe – cuts off toe to make it fit. Taken as the royal bride. Bird sings to Prince on way to the palace – Sister 1 is a fraud.

Sister 2 tries on shoe – cuts off part of heel to make it fit. Taken as the royal bride. Bird sings to Prince on way to the palace – Sister 2 is a fraud.

Prince asks is there are any other daughters. Aschenputtel cleans herself up and tries the shoe. It fits. She is taken as the royal bride. The bird that has watched over her goes to the palace with her perched on her shoulder.

On the way to (and from) the wedding the birds pick out the eyes of the stepsisters as punishment for their wickedness and falsehood.

http://www.latrobe.edu.au/childlit/StWeb...grimm.html

[Shell B]

They really had the hots for fucked up punishment in Germany back . . . then. Wait.

[Epimethean]

Fast forward: The Germans make the nastiest S&M porn in the business.

[Shell B]

The prince raped Sleeping Beauty while she was in a coma.

[Cato]

The prince raped Sleeping Beauty while she was in a coma.

Vegans will only be concerned about the pea surviving the rape.

[Shell B]

I think that was the Princess and the Pea, but I getchya.

[Oldandeasilyconfused]

In the original Snow White, the Queen was the villain. I guess somehow eating a dead person's heart is worse than this:

"As punishment for her wicked ways, a pair of heated iron shoes are brought forth with tongs and placed before the Queen. She is then forced to step into the iron shoes and to dance until she drops dead."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snow_White#Story_outline

Any other Grimmisms?

Pretty sure most of Grimm's fairy tales have been REALLY watered down from the the folk tales on which they are based.

The Grimm's legacy contains legends, novellas and folk stories, the vast majority of which were not intended as children's tales. Deeply concerned by the content of some of the tales—such as those that showed children being eaten—von Armin suggested they be removed. Instead the brothers added an introduction with cautionary advice that parents steer children toward age-appropriate stories. Despite von Armin's unease, none of the tales were eliminated from the collection, in the brothers' belief that all the tales were of value and reflected inherent cultural qualities. Furthermore, the stories were didactic in nature at a time when discipline relied on fear, according to scholar Linda Dégh, who explains that tales such as "Little Red Riding Hood" and "Hansel and Gretel" were written to be "warning tales" for children.[25]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brothers_Grimm

[Epimethean]

The prince raped Sleeping Beauty while she was in a coma.

I read up on that one. It seems to have been somewhat influenced by Euripides' Medea after the children are born from the rape.

BTW, Shell, have you read John Connolly's The Book of Lost Things?

[Shell B]

I haven't, Epi. I am going to google it now, though.

In "The Golden Bird," a prince has to cut off the head and feet of a fox to discover that it is another prince. No kissing frogs up in this bitch.

Free on Kindle, by the way. This thread has inspired me to read them all. http://www.amazon.com/Grimms-Fairy-Tales...les+kindle

[Minimalist]

I don't remember that from the Disney version.

Yeah, they left that out in favor of disabled dwarfs.