Can I just say, and I'm just being honest...

[Edwardo Piet]

CIJSAIJBH

Slow the fuck down and leave me the fuck alone. How is this not pressuring me?! If you want to show me you care then respect my boundaries and stop with the damn double standards rather than trying to control me and pestering me. I am not going to change my answer so stop making me repeat myself over and over. I live my life my way and you live your life your way okay? Stop trying to make me change for you when I don't try to make you change for me. That isn't love. Love is wanting me to have what I want for myself just as I want you to have what you want for yourself. Wanting me to live my life your way is not what I call love. It's what I call being a control freak.

If you want me to pay more attention to you then you are going exactly the opposite way about it than you ought to. I don't want a fake display of you pretending to change your ways and then giving up when I don't change mine. Just be yourself. I'm tired of the fakery. When you temporarily stop bothering me you're supposed to do that out of genuine respect for me and my wishes... you're not supposed to do it temporarily to try and change my behavior and then when I am still not ready yet you can say "See it doesn't make a difference."

The whole point of generosity and compassion is to give and to care for its own sake. Not to get something back in return. Be authentic and stop being manipulative or fuck off.

D.N.A. doesn't mean a thing and as far as upbringing is considered... you certainly fucked that up. Even the worst people I've ever known gave me more freedom and less pressure and manipulation and more HONESTY (you know, that word you have such a massive problem with because you have no integrity) than you have even when they were abusing me. Yes even including the bitch. It's no coincidence that my anxiety gets better the less I have to do with you. It's no coincidence that I had my medication reduced and my health improved more the less time I spent around you. I'll accept what you give me because you don't have to give me it you just pretend like you do and to be honest I think that's the very least of what you fucking owe me.

I can't fucking tell you anything because you will never ever admit it when you've done wrong... or even completely mistreated me for years. And yes, I get it, your pride is too high now and that would make you feel guilty for you to ever admit it. You're someone who has shouted at me in anger saying "DON'T MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY!" when I've told you that you've hurt me.... despite the fact that you guilt-trip me all the time. Emotional manipulation is like a religion for you. I am disgusted. Whenever I start to feel better about you you persist in the exact things I say are hurting me and continue to remind me that I'm wrong to start feeling better about you as I'll only set myself up for more manipulation from you. It saddens me so much that you are more interested in the obligations in your head rather than stopping with persistently damaging your relationship with me. I'd rather 10 years of never seeing you than 10 years of you being so incredibly selfish and hurtful and possessive towards someone you're supposed to love.

Have you ever thought that a lot of my learned helplessness was taught to me by your being an utter utter control freak towards me?

Maybe I was born with some issues.... but shouting at me all my life whenever I made a mistake was NOT the best way to help me with those issues. You couldn't have possibly scared me away more from personal growth than you did without getting more physical with me... which you didn't have to because somebody else did. And you never listened to me when I told you about them out of concern for me... you only cared once they became too big of a problem for you. You are destroying any love I ever had for you. I don't care who you are because you're still a selfish manipulative bitch and it seems to me you always have been and you just brainwashed me by keeping me in a bubble.

[Kernel Sohcahtoa]

CIJS...
We have some pretty smart kids in this forum and I'm having a proud moment. When I was their age I was debating if as a Christian I'd experience the end of times or not. Lol

When I was young (high school days), I didn't care about academics in the least, nor did I like school for that matter. More importantly, IMO, during these early years, I didn't allow myself to realize that school is much more than teachers, books, tests, and homework: it is an opportunity to learn to think for oneself, to expand one's thinking, and to become an intellectual leader via going beyond what the books and the teacher says and developing one's own thoughts, theories, and conclusions about the subject-matter and connecting it all to oneself and to the world/reality that one occupies. 


With that said, I always find it cool to see AF's teenage members taking an active interest in academics, ideas, and intellectual growth: IMO, it will give them a head start in becoming leaders in whatever it is that they want to pursue.  In addition, there are definitely plenty of intelligent posters of all age groups on these forums.   In particular, I hope that I am able to maintain the level of curiosity and personal cultivation of some of the members here who are much more experienced in life than I am.

[J a c k]

I posted a rant once somewhere else and I read it again today. It hit home.
"Remember how I said that shit happens? Well, it does. It can land on your head during your morning jog, or you can step on it in the front yard. Either way, it happens. Go ahead. Throw a tantrum. Give that pigeon the finger. Once you calm down, though, it's time to clean up and move on. I have learned that sometimes shit happens, and it's nobody's fault. There is no reason. Nobody to blame. The fuckin' pigeon had to let it go, dammit! I am convinced that sometimes to fix things once they have become shitty, one must endure difficult times that may seem worse than the original problem. It will be difficult to survive, and others might be affected, too. It's nobody's fault. Yeah, it sucks. We wish nobody had to suffer by our decisions. Sadly, shit happened. It will only get worse if we don't clean it up. Doing something to fix it will pay off at the end. When life throws us shit... mix it with soil and plant something. I call this rant: Shit!"

[Jello]

CIJS:


I wish i had someone to share all my cool (well, boring) history knowledge with ;-;

[J a c k]

CIJS?

---

I miss sex.

---

[Edwardo Piet]

CIJS?

Me too.

[brewer]

CIJS?

---

I miss sex.

---

Adjust your sights. Elevation and windage.

[The Valkyrie]

CIJS?

---

I miss sex.

---

Do you know anyone you can just bang without getting all committed?

A friend?  A work colleague (that wouldn't make it awkward at work)?

I'd send you Hugh Jackman but he's mine.

Or WILL be.

My precious!

[Edwardo Piet]

Damn... I wish I could find someone to bang without getting all committed. Lol.

[J a c k]

CIJS?

---

I miss sex.

---

Do you know anyone you can just bang without getting all committed?

A friend?  A work colleague (that wouldn't make it awkward at work)?

I'd send you Hugh Jackman but he's mine.

Or WILL be.

My precious!

Yes. I know people who wouldn't get committed, but I don't want to bang them. I also know people who I'd like to bang, but they'd want to get committed. No, thanks. As to people to whom getting committed and banging wouldn't be such a bad thing, lost my chance. I could always bang my neighbor, but then it would get awkward when we coincide at taking out the trash and bumped into each other. "Oh, not only have I heard you jacking off through the thin walls, but now I know what your crack looks like." I could bang one of my coworkers, but her girlfriend can probably whip my ass and I'm cool not being beaten up. I could get on a plane and bang someone far away, but that would take more than a day to make the trip worth our while, so I need to accumulate PTO hours at work. So you see, I've given this a lot of thought.

P.S. Since Jackman is taken, may I get Ellen Page? Thanks.