(August 4, 2015 at 3:54 pm)Jenny A Wrote:(August 4, 2015 at 2:45 pm)Exian Wrote: As an atheist, I see no reason to save one's self for marriage anymore. But I wonder if there is some benefit to saving yourself outside of sinning (which, of course, I don't believe in)?
My new view of sex is that it can be very unhealthy to hold sex up like that. It worked for you C_L, but imagine if it didn't work out for you (I'm not saying everything worked out perfectly for you, and that you've never known a hardship). You would have been crushed, yeah? I know I was, and I don't know that I came out stronger either. Because I was blind sided, I developed a strong distrust with women (not in general- specifically as a love interest), and that depends on if I even decide its worth it to try. Had I had a lower opinion of sex and a more realistic understanding of relationships when I was younger, I may not have had to go through that.
Sex is a big part of romantic relationships. Prior to birth control, saving it until marriage might make sense just because of the risk. But, I can't imagine why saving it until the attachment is permanent would be a good idea now. Sex is an important part of bonding (besides being fun) and finding out what kind of sex partner they are before committing is a very good idea.
Religion aside, I still think saving sex for marriage is still a better option... for practical reasons.
It is the only 100%, for sure way of avoiding pregnancy out of wedlock and decreasing the spread of STDs.
While hormonal birth control has a very small failure rate for pregnancy, it is still not healthy for a woman's body to be pumped up with synthetic hormones for decades at a time.... And it does nothing to prevent STDs. Barrier contraceptives (condoms, diaphragm, etc) are not harmful in any way, but they are less reliable in avoiding pregnancy, and don't protect 100% from STDs either.
It just seems objectively better to have less sexual partners, and to wait until you are in a life long commitment.
I get the argument about sexual compatibility, but I'd say that you can get a pretty good sense of someone's sexuality through making out and good, honest communication about it.
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
-walsh
-walsh
