YOU: "I won't encourage my kids to believe in Santa Claus because, like God, he doesn't exist. Promoting a lie is wrong."
HER: "I hate it when you say that God, the one thing that kept me from killing myself, is a lie."
YOU: "I'm sorry, I didn't realize. I'll be sensitive of that from now on, because I value your feelings and friendship."
First, while I can appreciate that you process things on a more cognitive level, you need to recognize that not everyone does. Women typically process things on an affective level, which (unless you're a completely self-centered prick) you need to respect and not expect everybody to process the way you do. And this is all the more important if she is a cherished friend who you value as a person in her own right. When she tells you that your words hurt her, as a friend you don't compound that hurt further; you apologize and stop. On her view, she has a relationship with God. For her, of what relevance is your view? She is not one of your kids, after all.
Second, you should be relieved that she doesn't process things on a logical level, for she could have buried you over that statement. To say that the proposition "God exists" is false shoulders an enormous burden of proof that, quite frankly, cannot be met—at least, not validly (i.e., it can be met using logical fallacies, such as argumentum ad ignorantiam). You're lucky you got away with it.
HER: "I hate it when you say that God, the one thing that kept me from killing myself, is a lie."
YOU: "I'm sorry, I didn't realize. I'll be sensitive of that from now on, because I value your feelings and friendship."
First, while I can appreciate that you process things on a more cognitive level, you need to recognize that not everyone does. Women typically process things on an affective level, which (unless you're a completely self-centered prick) you need to respect and not expect everybody to process the way you do. And this is all the more important if she is a cherished friend who you value as a person in her own right. When she tells you that your words hurt her, as a friend you don't compound that hurt further; you apologize and stop. On her view, she has a relationship with God. For her, of what relevance is your view? She is not one of your kids, after all.
Second, you should be relieved that she doesn't process things on a logical level, for she could have buried you over that statement. To say that the proposition "God exists" is false shoulders an enormous burden of proof that, quite frankly, cannot be met—at least, not validly (i.e., it can be met using logical fallacies, such as argumentum ad ignorantiam). You're lucky you got away with it.
Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when
called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason.
(Oscar Wilde)
called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason.
(Oscar Wilde)
