Unromantic Atheism?

[Esquilax]

I love my wife because she's a good person, and good for me emotionally and psychologically. Intellect and emotions aren't opposites, they're just occasionally in conflict: the problems that we see with being overly emotional are all cases where our emotions lead us to ignore evidence that might otherwise lead us to a different conclusion, but that doesn't mean that we cannot have rationally justified, emotionally satisfying views and actions. It just means we gotta realize that our emotions overcompensate sometimes, which is hardly a controversial opinion. We have all sorts of terms to describe people acting precisely that way.

It goes without saying that most people are capable love. And I'm certainly capable of romantic gestures. But I'm not comfortable with the thought of having romantic feelings or sentiment. I simply don't have the faith required to believe that love can fix everything. Or even most things.

Love isn't magic, nor is it a solution to problems (well, not unrelated problems. It certainly has its benefits), because love isn't a thing on its own. It's contextual and informed by the person you happen to be in love with. Ideally that person can prompt you to work on your problems out of care for your best interests, but that change will always come from within, not without. You just might be in a better psychological place to accomplish that change if you're buoyed by a loving relationship.

No need to have faith in love's ability to fix things. Indulging in it because it feels good and can do some things is plenty sufficient: stuff doesn't have to be perfect to be worth having.