(December 11, 2015 at 5:55 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote:(December 11, 2015 at 11:56 am)drfuzzy Wrote: I attended a rather brilliant group therapy session on forgiveness that has never left me.
Forgiveness, in the Judeo-Christian western sense of the word, is a deliberate act. It can very easily devolve into a type of one-upmanship and moral superiority stance. The "forgiver" often is known to say that he's "taking the higher ground" and "being the better man" - - while the "forgiven" is judged as less than, and often removed from the circle of friends and family. The forgiver really hasn't forgiven anything, he has just chosen to walk away, feeling superior. This mindset heals no-one.
Who's version of forgiveness is this? Definitely not what I've been taught.
The leader of the group was studying the psychological works of Virginia Satir, if I remember correctly. It was a bit different from how I was raised as well, but made a whole lot of sense. If you include the paragraph following the one that you quoted, it describes their alternative re-framing, or perhaps re-defining, the mindset that helps attain forgiveness. I found it very helpful, since I was having difficulty in that area. And I found it more supportive of the Gospels, since I identified as Christian at that time.
"The family that prays together...is brainwashing their children."- Albert Einstein
