RE: Love
June 14, 2016 at 12:57 pm
(This post was last modified: June 14, 2016 at 1:00 pm by Neo-Scholastic.)
I think you are misinterpreting Darcy's appeal and Liz's response. In your reading, Darcy seems to claim to love Liz unconditionally. Liz says otherwise, that love is conditional. But does she mean that Darcy must also love the flaws and darkness in Liz. I do not think so. The reason why Darcy says that his expression of love goes against reason and better judgment is his appraisal of social implications. Liz's response it that he must realize that their love would exist in the presence of judgments of other with respect to class, social standing, and financial terms.
I also do not think your interpretation takes into account any distinction between what is essential to identity and what is accidental. Here I am thinking about the notion of "Tough Love." James may strongly identify with destructive obsessions and compulsions, like depression. His friends and family will recognize this inclination as an accidental trait and consider it right and proper for them to condemn James's positive appraisal of himself as a realist. Their pretense is that they are the ones that know that being depressed "isn't who James really is" but rather a sign of an illness that prevents James from being "who he truly is." James's pretense is that part of "who he truly is" is being essentially wise enough to see the world as it is.
Loneliness seems more like a response to feelings of rejection and the perceived indifference of others. People also feel lonely because they feel vulnerable to condemnation. Most certainly being known and validated may assuage loneliness, I do not believe anyone can be truly and fully known and understood at the deepest level by others (or by himself for that matter). Some amount of existential alienation always remains as a gap between Self and Other. But, like guilt, loneliness can drive a person to overcome their own fears, self-imposed limitation and flawed perceptions about themselves.
I also do not think your interpretation takes into account any distinction between what is essential to identity and what is accidental. Here I am thinking about the notion of "Tough Love." James may strongly identify with destructive obsessions and compulsions, like depression. His friends and family will recognize this inclination as an accidental trait and consider it right and proper for them to condemn James's positive appraisal of himself as a realist. Their pretense is that they are the ones that know that being depressed "isn't who James really is" but rather a sign of an illness that prevents James from being "who he truly is." James's pretense is that part of "who he truly is" is being essentially wise enough to see the world as it is.
(June 14, 2016 at 10:51 am)Kingpin Wrote: I can promise you right now, if no one knows the real you in all your weaknesses, shortcomings, failings or the darker side of your character, if nobody knows that, even if you are one of the most popular people at work, school or church, I can guarantee that you are desperately lonely.
Loneliness seems more like a response to feelings of rejection and the perceived indifference of others. People also feel lonely because they feel vulnerable to condemnation. Most certainly being known and validated may assuage loneliness, I do not believe anyone can be truly and fully known and understood at the deepest level by others (or by himself for that matter). Some amount of existential alienation always remains as a gap between Self and Other. But, like guilt, loneliness can drive a person to overcome their own fears, self-imposed limitation and flawed perceptions about themselves.
