I made it to 22 days sober and relapsed. Part of it was my husband. He has a temper and he was in a bad mood all day Thanksgiving and the next day. Yelling at me for cooking the turkey too early, yelling at the kids and their cousin for basically just being kids. Getting angry at me for having to watch the kids while I went to an AA meeting.
Another reason is isolation. I feel like there was this point when I was a kid that I couldn't take the bullying and rejection any more and I just shut down. And now I find it hard to connect with people.
I was feeling pretty discouraged, like the effort I made didn't matter, and I just didn't want to keep feeling what I was feeling, so I bought a bottle of vodka. I woke up at 3 am sick as hell with no memory of half the previous day and pictures on my phone that my husband took of me lying on the floor passed out in a puddle of vomit. I went to a meeting that day and picked up a white chip.
Now I'm on day 3 sober. Hoping I make it to 30 days this time.
Another reason is isolation. I feel like there was this point when I was a kid that I couldn't take the bullying and rejection any more and I just shut down. And now I find it hard to connect with people.
I was feeling pretty discouraged, like the effort I made didn't matter, and I just didn't want to keep feeling what I was feeling, so I bought a bottle of vodka. I woke up at 3 am sick as hell with no memory of half the previous day and pictures on my phone that my husband took of me lying on the floor passed out in a puddle of vomit. I went to a meeting that day and picked up a white chip.
Now I'm on day 3 sober. Hoping I make it to 30 days this time.
A Gemma is forever.
