Deidre's Ramblings

[*Deidre*]

I thought I commented earlier. Guess I didn’t.

Thank you for sharing, Deidre! It’s great to have you around again and this time you’ve stayed longer. Here. Have a bro hug.   Love ya, guuuuuurl.

I’ll be reading your stuff for sure.

Thank you, you're the best! I'm glad to be back, and there were never any bad reasons why I had left, like I read sometimes in the ''departed'' thread.    I hope you choose to post a journal too, because I love reading about your life. Have a great day, chick! 

It's lovely to have a kind, thoughtful theist like yourself here. You're one of the few I don't have on ignore!

I wish you all the best with your journey, wherever it leads you

Aww, thank you! I forget there is an ignore feature here. lol 

Don't think for one moment that we're done with you yet young lady. We'll get you my pretty, and your false idol too.

BWA FUCKIN HAHAHA. 

Deconvert yet? No? Shit! That's all I got.

haha Well, I did do it before so........ 

[REDACTED DUE TO THREAD BLOG DERAILMENT PROTOCOLS IN PLACE. MH TO BE FINED $3.50]

haha You know, just do you. Within reason. 

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Saturday morning May 12th...

Dear journal;

Tomorrow is Mother's Day, and I need to find the perfect gift for my mom, today. My parents are pretty wealthy, so what do you buy for someone who seems to have everything? Hmm. Maybe spending time with her, more time with her, that's what she'd like. She would probably want me to attend Catholic mass with her tomorrow, but I'm afraid that won't happen. I indulge my parents now and again, and go to church with them on holidays, but it's not something that I can see myself doing tomorrow.

We are planning to see my husband's mom tomorrow, as well. It's weird how things change when you get married. You go from only concerning yourself with yourself, and your own life, to needing to look out for someone else and their interests. To be a good wife, what does this mean, I wonder? I married an amazingly down to earth guy, who always seems to put me first. In turn, I try to do the same, but sometimes, without thinking, I don't always consider his feelings or input on something. It's a work in progress, and marriage/relationships can often times reveal things about yourself, that you didn't really think much about. And sometimes, I don't always like what I see in me. A selfishness that I wish wasn't there. It doesn't feel purposeful, and maybe we're all a little selfish.

I think being a good spouse varies for different people, but there's definitely sacrifice involved. You don't always get your own way, and that's not such a bad thing. Becoming a partnership with equity and respect, is what we strive for in our relationship. The awesome thing is, I was friends with him before we started dating. So, we have a special trust built, and to me, that's the crux of a good relationship. Of course, hot sex and chemistry is important, but without trust...without mutual equity, you don't have much. I don't want to ever turn into a couple that remains together, just because. I pray we always keep striving to be better for each other. However that looks.

I want to be a good wife... a great wife. He deserves that.