(November 13, 2018 at 6:33 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote:(November 9, 2018 at 5:57 pm)wyzas Wrote: Sorry, but the pity party got old, especially the last one (that went something like "people with babies shouldn't talk about it around me"). While I feel for her, I don't need to hear the fishing for pity. How many times do we have to say "there there"?
I was alerted by a fellow member that my name was being brought up on this thread so I came to take a look.
As people may imagine, this one in particular struck a cord and it's been impossible not to address it. And not just because the claim that I said "people shouldn't talk about it around me" is a misrepresentation of my words...
...But because I hardly EVER talk to ANYONE in my real life about my baby loss/infertility. I don't do it because I don't want to burden friends/family with it, nor do I want to put people in an awkward situation. I act with them like I'm totally fine and downplay how I am feeling in the rare occasions that they do bring it up. When people reach out to me to tell me they are pregnant or go on to me about their kids, I just smile and go along with it and act totally normal even though it kills me inside. I've made a total of 3 posts about this on my facebook in the past 2 1/2 years - one to say I lost the baby (since I had unfortunately already announced my pregnancy), the second one a few months ago to say I was practically sterile and never going to have kids (because I know people are wondering and it makes for an elephant in the room, since people don't know because I never talk about it), and the 3rd one just recently to say I was moving on.
Since I don't talk about it in real life, I have on occasion vented about it here. My post that is being addressed above was posted in the CIJS thread, because that is specifically where vent posts are made. And that is all it was - me using it as an outlet to vent. It wasn't an attempt to garner pity or attention.
To refer to any of this as my "pity party" couldn't be any more of a punch to the gut. Especially coming from someone who I considered a forum buddy whom I've had some contact with outside the forums.
I'm glad you're moving on. That's all I ever wanted for you.
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental.
