Explain left and right to me (political terms)

[Aegon]

In American terms:  

Left = Large government with a degree of wealth redistribution to social programs for retirement, healthcare, education, social safety nets, etc.
Right= Small government, free markets, minimal regulation, no redistribution of wealth.

These two visions of what government should be are not so compatible with each other.

I'm going to add on to a couple of others and say that this is a bit of a ....fantastical view, though it's the one I was taught growing up. It just really isn't true. Both want big government where they want and small government where they want. Both want regulation of some aspects of the economy / some industries, and deregulation of others. 

I think it's easier to differentiate them based on social terms... or even socio-economic terms, rather than purely fiscal. Because at the end of the day they're virtually the same in regards to government involvement, whether they like it or not. It'd be much clearer (though more complex) to differentiate them on their priorities rather than principles. Because neither of the two parties we have are very principled.

When you get to libertarian-minded folks (who can be left or right), that's where the big vs small govt distinction is clearer. But there are a very few true libertarian Americans (most are generally run-of-the-mill conservatives who aren't super against weed, or something)