Supporting Family Members Financially
September 24, 2019 at 1:13 pm
(This post was last modified: September 24, 2019 at 1:14 pm by EgoDeath.)
I had the recent experience of having a family member ask for some money. I won't go into details, as it's really not important, but I will add that since the gift was given, I am weary of continuing this trend. It wasn't a loan, it was a one-time gift, and I made that clear. However, I'm worried that this family member may begin to expect more money as time goes on. I have no problem helping someone in need, especially if it's someone I care about. But the concern about enabling someone you love is a very real one, and I don't want this family member to think I'm their ticket to a free ride.
Have any of you guys had experience with this? How do you avoid enabling someone when you want to support them? Surely, I'm not breaking the bank by doing what I did, but I don't want it to continue either, even if I can afford it. It's one thing to help someone out once in a while, it's another to enable them into thinking they don't have to work or can depend on you for money.
I suppose many parents deal with this type of dilemma with their children, but in this case the person is older than me. I just don't want this to turn into bad blood. Sometimes when you start to treat people a certain way, they expect that treatment forever, then treat you like the bad guy when that treatment stops. Even if you never owed it to them in the first place.
Have any of you guys had experience with this? How do you avoid enabling someone when you want to support them? Surely, I'm not breaking the bank by doing what I did, but I don't want it to continue either, even if I can afford it. It's one thing to help someone out once in a while, it's another to enable them into thinking they don't have to work or can depend on you for money.
I suppose many parents deal with this type of dilemma with their children, but in this case the person is older than me. I just don't want this to turn into bad blood. Sometimes when you start to treat people a certain way, they expect that treatment forever, then treat you like the bad guy when that treatment stops. Even if you never owed it to them in the first place.
If you're frightened of dying, and you're holding on, you'll see devils tearing your life away. But if you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the Earth.