Groomed at 17

[paulpablo]

The video is from a youtuber called Nikki Land

I found out about her because I was searching for tattoo tour videos otherwise I wouldn't know who she was.

I think if I understand correctly she became famous via YouTube because she was seeing the 23 year old who she is saying groomed her, he was already relatively youtube famous but i hadn't heard of either of them personally.

The video is one of her more recent videos and is easy to find.

The grooming in this case is just purely for a sexual relationship.

I'm not really arguing that it isn't grooming, it probably technically is.

It's just from my perspective, maybe because I'm from the UK, or because of something else, I don't see the age gap of 17 to 23 being such a big deal.

In the UK we had the cases of pakistani men grooming young girls, but they were like 13, 14 or 15 and it seems most weren't just pestered for sex, it was gangs of men getting them in a house, stealing their phone, and not letting them go and so on.
Or the cases on how to catch a predator where the girls and boys are like 12, 14 or 15.

When I hear grooming I think of cases like this and others, whereas this woman is talking about being groomed  at 17 and how this guy used to interrupt her during the youtube videos they made together and didn't listen to her ideas. And the comments are commending her on being brave and getting through this.

Although I want to add the video is so long I did skim through it so maybe I missed the really traumatic parts, but all I could hear is evidence of a pretty shit relationship but nothing that would require therapy.

I took time to watch the entire video. What a very powerful statement of her own personal history, and I believe her testimony. She went through some shit with this guy. He is obsessed with her. What a damn jerk! The important thing is she got out of that abusive relationship after 5 years, and warns other young women who may be watching this video to get out of abusive relationships and seek help. I think she is providing a sort of public service through this video. If I had a daughter, I would make sure she watched this video.

I didn't watch the entire thing, what were the most traumatic things she went through?

Anytime I skipped through the video it was basically as I said, he interrupted her while making videos, didn't listen to her ideas, put her on a guilt trip sometimes.

Everything she's talking about to me sounds normal.

Every girl I've broke up with has cried and made me feel massively guilty and I've done similar things when girls have broke up with me because I'm upset and i want them to feel a bit guilty.

I was only a year older than her when I got with a girl in her early 20s and with a girl who was 27 when i was 19.

Arguing about someone not listening to you and interrupting you is also really normal.

Again, I didn't watch the whole video and maybe I missed an important part. I didn't hear about any violence or severe manipulation or humiliation. It could exist I just didn't encounter that on whatever part of the video I watched.