Atheist and ex-gay?

[sleep]

Thanks for being a prick! I was dying for someone to verbally assault.

You seem very angry. People say that I have emotional, mood, and anger issues. I feel like yelling at people a lot too.

Anyway I did think about my OP a bit and I realize that although it may seem true, I think I'm just bitter because most people reject me and mock me and hate me. Most gay men do too. The only ones who ever asked me out or liked me were the ugly desperate ones. It just makes me mad that I could never fit in or be considered cool by anyone. I've been told that I'm "projecting my self-hatred" onto everyone else. Maybe so, but I wouldn't have that self-hatred if everyone wasn't so mean to me to begin with.

It still seems a hell of a lot easier to be straight, though. I always feel paranoid now. That I'm too feminine, that it's too obvious that I'm gay, that I'm hiding something, and I can't really help it. I don't even want to talk to anyone anymore or go out in public.

I'm 19, I turn 20 in two months.