And now a short play set in a vestry where a Bishop and 3 acolytes are sitting and discussing a problematic passage in Revelations:
Bishop: "They are seven Kings; five have fallen, one is, the other has not yet come; and when he comes, he must remain a little while." OK boys - I want to make something of this, what have we got?
Acolyte 1: Could be allegorical Boss. 7 hills of Rome?
Bishop: No I want Kings - which Kings for crying out loud.
Acolyte 2: Might just be 7 Kings with something in common.
Bishop: I like your thinking there. Seven Kings with something in common. What have we got?
Acolyte 3: Well a lot of them have big noses. Look at the konk on that one, for example.
Bishop: Noses won't cut it. We need something more substantial, and I want them related to Christianity so we'd better look within the Holy Roman Empire.
Acolyte 2: Well there were 7 Charles' who were kings.
Bishop: Brilliant. 7 Charles it is then. Is there anything about the name Charles that we could use to justify the choice? Anything at all?
Acolyte 2: Oh we can find something I'm sure. We'll scan through a bunch of languages and interpretations. We'll get something.
Bishop: Excellent. So we have a reason to choose Charles. Now we want another Charles who fits the bill for the 8th one a.k.a. the Beast.
Acolyte 1: Manson Boss, Manson. Evil Bastard he was. Gotta go with him.
Bishop: Just a psycho and one that didn't win through.
Acolyte 2: DARWIN Boss. Charles Fuckin' Darwin. Gotta be boss, gotta be. What a beast he was - reckoned he came from them too. In fact - you could say he evolved into one. Tee hee.
Bishop: I think we need a King but it would be great if it could be Darwin - see what you can find on him.
Acolyte 1: Dickens? Chaplin? De Gaulle?
Bishop: A King numb-nuts. I want a King. Was Chaplin a King?
Acolyte 1: Erm.....of comedy.
Bishop: Just go. Leave us. You aren't getting this at all.
Acolyte 2: Er....Boss.....Prince Charles of England. He should be King someday and I am just playing with the gematria and I think I can get 666 out of him.
Acolyte 3: He has a big nose too. And big ears. Maybe we should check out the ears on the others.
Bishop: Prince Charles? Really? He's not exactly the incarnation of the Dark Lord is he. I mean you look at Charles and your not thinking Sith are you. Is he really the best you can get for me?
Acolyte 2: Oh don't worry about that Boss. Once we get the numbers to stack up no-one will point out that he's slightly less threatening than a wet mouse. At least he disposed of his wife in suspicious circumstances.
Bishop: Hmmm. Well see what you can do with it. I wanted something to scare the crap out of everyone. That will be a hard job with Big ears. Lets meet up next week and see what you've got for me.
Bishop: "They are seven Kings; five have fallen, one is, the other has not yet come; and when he comes, he must remain a little while." OK boys - I want to make something of this, what have we got?
Acolyte 1: Could be allegorical Boss. 7 hills of Rome?
Bishop: No I want Kings - which Kings for crying out loud.
Acolyte 2: Might just be 7 Kings with something in common.
Bishop: I like your thinking there. Seven Kings with something in common. What have we got?
Acolyte 3: Well a lot of them have big noses. Look at the konk on that one, for example.
Bishop: Noses won't cut it. We need something more substantial, and I want them related to Christianity so we'd better look within the Holy Roman Empire.
Acolyte 2: Well there were 7 Charles' who were kings.
Bishop: Brilliant. 7 Charles it is then. Is there anything about the name Charles that we could use to justify the choice? Anything at all?
Acolyte 2: Oh we can find something I'm sure. We'll scan through a bunch of languages and interpretations. We'll get something.
Bishop: Excellent. So we have a reason to choose Charles. Now we want another Charles who fits the bill for the 8th one a.k.a. the Beast.
Acolyte 1: Manson Boss, Manson. Evil Bastard he was. Gotta go with him.
Bishop: Just a psycho and one that didn't win through.
Acolyte 2: DARWIN Boss. Charles Fuckin' Darwin. Gotta be boss, gotta be. What a beast he was - reckoned he came from them too. In fact - you could say he evolved into one. Tee hee.
Bishop: I think we need a King but it would be great if it could be Darwin - see what you can find on him.
Acolyte 1: Dickens? Chaplin? De Gaulle?
Bishop: A King numb-nuts. I want a King. Was Chaplin a King?
Acolyte 1: Erm.....of comedy.
Bishop: Just go. Leave us. You aren't getting this at all.
Acolyte 2: Er....Boss.....Prince Charles of England. He should be King someday and I am just playing with the gematria and I think I can get 666 out of him.
Acolyte 3: He has a big nose too. And big ears. Maybe we should check out the ears on the others.
Bishop: Prince Charles? Really? He's not exactly the incarnation of the Dark Lord is he. I mean you look at Charles and your not thinking Sith are you. Is he really the best you can get for me?
Acolyte 2: Oh don't worry about that Boss. Once we get the numbers to stack up no-one will point out that he's slightly less threatening than a wet mouse. At least he disposed of his wife in suspicious circumstances.
Bishop: Hmmm. Well see what you can do with it. I wanted something to scare the crap out of everyone. That will be a hard job with Big ears. Lets meet up next week and see what you've got for me.
Kuusi palaa, ja on viimeinen kerta kun annan vaimoni laittaa jouluvalot!
