Quote:Submission: in brief, I'm the sort of sub that causes trouble. I'm not obedient, and I act up on purpose. The men I submit to aren't the sort that play up to the overly-muscular Dom stereotype. They're not dressed in leather and barking orders and flailing whips. They're all wickedly intelligent, and they like being sassed by a smart woman. I don't worship. I yield...eventually. I make them work for breaking me down as much as they make me work to endure their untender mercies and for my own release. None of my Doms come to me because they want someone who will kneel for them automatically. They Dom me because I won't give in until they've given 110% of their clever cruelty, just like they won't give me my release until I've yielded to their satisfaction.
The ebb and flow of power is so difficult to explain to people who stand outside of it - EL James could never comprehend it.
I've been attracted to guys before in vaguer, more vanilla ways, but never with lasting permanence. It's definitely the Doms that keep my attention through the years. I don't know how to explain the need to be mastered by someone who can prove himself stronger than me - the release is part and parcel with finally surrendering after the guy has proved himself worthy. I want a guy who will stand up to me. It's that friction that always drives me to be better, to be smarter, to be stronger. I guess 'serving' them in ways is related to that, once they prove worth serving.
I've never fully understood the acting up on purpose thing, you made it sound quite sexy though. I suppose for me the assessment of a Domme's worthiness would come before entering a relationship with them rather than through challenging them - maybe sub-consciously, I could see myself doing that
It's all hypothetical for me though, my life has been on hold since I was 15 due to mental illness. I've pretty sure I know what qualities I would like in a domme and what kind of submissive I would be but i've no way of knowing what that would be like in practice
Your dog looks like Bill Maher
“The larger the group, the more toxic, the more of your beauty as an individual you have to surrender for the sake of group thought. And when you suspend your individual beauty you also give up a lot of your humanity. You will do things in the name of a group that you would never do on your own. Injuring, hurting, killing, drinking are all part of it, because you've lost your identity, because you now owe your allegiance to this thing that's bigger than you are and that controls you.” - George Carlin
