(May 24, 2015 at 2:10 pm)Saxmoof Wrote: When you question yourself are you questioning whether the thoughts might not be the illness talking? I ask because I know from experience with mental illness (depression and social anxiety) how hard it is to differentiate between a real thought and an illness related one, thoughts like that are hard to ignore because they feel as real as any other in the moment. I can also relate to how having your state of mind altered can make you doubt absolutely everything about yourself
Yeah, exactly. It goes like this: I have a thought rush through my brain, it causes me to freak out, I examine it and try to explain to myself I'd never do that or it's not true, but it doesn't help. Five minutes later there it goes again from the top. Knowing that this is a characterized, diagnosed disorder is somewhat comforting in that it doesn't feel like I'm some freak all alone with this. I try to tell myself it's not my thought, that it's just my brain, my disorder, but it doesn't really help much.
(May 24, 2015 at 2:10 pm)Saxmoof Wrote: I do tons of ruminating aswell, do you have to stop everything you're doing and isolate yourself from people while you ruminate? I can definitely relate if that's the case
It's more like the obsession of questioning myself is always in the background, but sometimes I spend unreasonable amounts of time on trying to sort it out. Like going online and searching for signs and sympotms, or even taking tests to try and get one definitive answer, but it never helps. Or I would just shut myself away from everyone for a while and do nothing but think about it
(May 24, 2015 at 2:10 pm)Saxmoof Wrote: Are you on any medication at the minute?
Currently not and that's something I'd like to avoid if possible
