(January 14, 2019 at 8:48 am)Acrobat Wrote:(January 13, 2019 at 2:49 pm)Der/die AtheistIn Wrote: When I tell my dad I thought I failed a certain exam, he exploded. He told me that I'm not serious, I don't try enough. He told me that he and my mom make efforts so I can study. He had a long speech.
Why doesn't he realize he makes things worse? The time I use to listen to his speech is time I could use for learning. Not to mention it also takes time for me to calm down after said speech.
Why does he tell me I don't try enough? I really try my best, I really do. There is a lot of work and I'm struggling to keep up with it. I also do have some emotional problems, which I didn't tell him or mom, but still. I have a lot of mood swings and when I'm feeling down It's hard for me to concentrate while learning. I figured out it would be best to take some time to calm down and then continue learning, but even then I lose some time. What should I do if I get mood swings during an exam? It never happened before. I have a therapy appointment, but it's only after the end of the semester and I still have 4 exams to go.
He also told me that one day he might get really pissed and make me change universities. And that if I don't learn might as well get a job. I don't know if he really means it, or just trying to scare me.
If I try to talk to him he won't listen.
I'm assuming your parents are paying for your school? If so it not hard to see why they're so invested in how you do, because nobody wants to pay for you to retake a course, etc.. Trying to find a balance between sympathy and frustration here for them is likely difficult.
I would suggest finding ways to make it more your financial burden than theirs, applying for student and private loans, grantsand scholarship, work study, etc..
That way the cost of your failures are carried more so by yourself than them.
I'd say having had LD and ADD it really is not helpful if a parent does not understand that kids learn differently and just because one person is good at something means everyone is good at the same things.
I get what you are saying. Parents don't want their children to struggle in life. But it still does no good to expect a child to be a clone of the parent, because they are not.
My X wife had both a masters and PHD in biochemistry. But even when she graduated, she knew of fellow students who ended up working at places like Starbucks. So it isn't just about grades.
I don't care where someone ends up as far as class, the more educated a society is the more stable it is on average. And as far as getting student loans, under our current GOP it is a rip off run by private loan companies, and nobody should be in dept for 20 or 30 years, regardless if the parent is paying or the kid is paying.
Just like our health care system, our college costs are outrageous. There is no good reason either costs should be so high in such a rich nation.
