I hope you get help. We all seem to be the stories we tell ourselves. Our success and failures seem to be dependent on what we narrate ourselves to be. You seem to have a very negative self narrative. Those seem to perpetuate themselves to an end. Only you can change your narrative.
"There ought to be a term that would designate those who actually follow the teachings of Jesus, since the word 'Christian' has been largely divorced from those teachings, and so polluted by fundamentalists that it has come to connote their polar opposite: intolerance, vindictive hatred, and bigotry." -- Philip Stater, Huffington Post
always working on cleaning my windows- me regarding Johari
always working on cleaning my windows- me regarding Johari
