Q: What did the pirate think of the wench's booty?
A: He thought it was plunderfull!
Q: What do Jewish Pirates say?
A: Ahoy vey!
Q: Why is the Jolly Roger grinning?
A: Because they crossed his funny bones! Arrgh!
Q: Why can't tree-huggers be pirates?
A: Because they ARRR Land Lubbers!!!!
A Humpback Story......
A large Humpback whale is lazily enjoying a beautiful day when he sees a female Humpback whale just a little ways off, and he thinks to himself that he's going to try to impress her...
He swims over to her, and breeches the surface, showing off the large hump on his back.
She looked unimpressed as she breached and showed a larger more well formed hump herself.
Now, a little embarrassed, he tries again to impress her by taking a breath and blowing a huge cloud of mist and water with a really nice rainbow in it.
Once again she looked unimpressed and she blew a larger cloud of mist, with a more beautiful rainbow.
Now clearly agitated, the Male sees a Navel vessel in the distance and races off toward it. Just before he collides with the ship, he dives, jumps out of the water and as he sails over the bow of the ship, he plucks a sailor off the deck and in one gulp swallows him whole!
He swam back to her very proud of himself, only to find the female object of his attentions with a disgusted look on her face...
As she swam off she said..."I'll Hump, I'll Blow, BUT I WON'T SWALLOW SEAMEN!
A pirate recently retired and joined the American Association of Retired, Reprehensible, Rapacious, Rabid Guys, otherwise known as AARRRRG!
Q: How do pirates know that they are pirates?
A: They think, therefore they ARRRR!!!!!
Q: Why can’t pirates learn the alphabet?
A: Because they insist there are 7 Cs
Q: Why did the pirate go to the Apple Store?
A: To buy an IPatch!
Q: What kind of ships do pirates have trouble with?
A: Relationships!