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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 12:34 am
(This post was last modified: February 19, 2013 at 12:35 am by fr0d0.)
Love is an emotional bond right? Sometimes I think you might not even realize unless the bond was broken or tested, and the realisation would hit you. Familial ties we don't choose. To me those can seem the strongest. We get to choose our mates. Is it different for the polygamous/polyamerous/monogamous? It seems to have very good purpose. Nothing drives us more than our emotions, and I've always felt that love is really the strongest emotion.
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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 12:43 am
(February 19, 2013 at 12:18 am)Rayaan Wrote: An article that I read recently and it seems that now would be an oppurtune time to post it here:
Viewpoint: Down with romantic love
Quote:Love is blind, the proverb goes, though it might be more accurate to say we are being blinded by a hyper version of romantic love, and are losing out on life as a result. To cut to the chase, I think that the romantic myth is one of the most pernicious of our times.
The myth is that there is someone out there with whom your life will be complete, and conversely, without whom your life would be a half-life. A major task of modern life is, therefore, to find this person and, falling in love, to cease to be two and become one.
It is hard to prove, though I wonder whether such a view of romance has become so monstrous in the pressure it puts on couples to find fulfilment in each other, that it actually undermines more relationships than supports them.
That is just an opinion, though, but I think it might be true for some people.
I agree, except I think that people buying into that are sabotaging their own happiness. I, for one, do not buy into the myth, and I mmmmmight even go so far as to say the "myth" isn't actually a myth at all, but rather propaganda which has been indoctrinated into a certain percent of the population of the world via ads and such for the wedding and diamond industries... oh, and religion. There is no such thing as a soulmate, and human relationships have no arbitrary timeline in which they are to exist. My grandma died with my grandpa at her side. My parents got divorced after eighteen years. I've never been married, but have had several long-term relationships that were mostly satisfying. I've been in love, and I'll tell you: it's worth the pain of breaking up. But, when it's over, it's over. The pressures of "this is forever", "I have to be perfect", etc. tend to sabotage relationships. I would rather be with someone forever, but take it day by day. I have no idea what I'm actually going to be like in... even... a year, let alone fifty, and neither does anyone else.
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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 3:07 am
"By love you mean big lightning bolts to the heart, where you can't eat and you can't work, and you just run off and get married and make babies. The reason you haven't felt is because it doesn't exist. What you call love was invented by guys like me...to sell nylons." - Don Draper, Mad Men
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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 4:02 am
Love, it's a fascinating theme, maybe I'll write a poem or a song about it one day.
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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 4:21 am
Nemo me impune lacessit.
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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 5:33 am
(February 19, 2013 at 12:43 am)rexbeccarox Wrote: I, for one, do not buy into the myth, and I mmmmmight even go so far as to say the "myth" isn't actually a myth at all, but rather propaganda which has been indoctrinated into a certain percent of the population of the world via ads and such for the wedding and diamond industries... oh, and religion.
I agree, some of the religions reinforce that idea as well.
In Islam, too, we are advised to get married if we are capable for that because marriage is considered to be a virtuous deed according to the Quran and a blessing and stuff (although not compulsory). I personally do not wish to get married, though. I know my reasons and one of them is that I basically find it a little uncomfortable that I would have to live, eat, sleep, chat, and do so many things with the same person for so long. Feels like I would have less privacy to do things my own way then. And maybe I'm the odd man here, but I never even had a desire for something like that. :S But oh well.
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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 7:59 am
Are you ready for the fire? We are firemen. WE ARE FIREMEN! The heat doesn’t bother us. We live in the heat. We train in the heat. It tells us that we’re ready, we’re at home, we’re where we’re supposed to be. Flames don’t intimidate us. What do we do? We control the flame. We control them. We move the flames where we want to. And then we extinguish them.
Impersonation is treason.
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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 9:39 am
(This post was last modified: February 19, 2013 at 9:44 am by thesummerqueen.)
At any rate, in a more serious response: if I were describing love - from deep friendship up into romantic love - it is the sudden realization that your life would be darker, greyer, and feel more meaningless without this person that you want to give the best to, and be the best for. I don't know that I believe in love at first sight, but I do believe in realizing it like a flash of lightening because of one word or gesture. I don't believe it happens the same way every time - like in the movies when someone is a widower and they say "I haven't felt like this since so and so" - bullshit (unless they just mean "happy"). People are never the same and the world you build between the two of you shouldn't be and won't be the same as with someone else.
Oddly, one of the best and truest quotes I've ever encountered about love isn't even a happy one.
Quote:“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up a whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life… You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore.
Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ or ‘how very perceptive’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love.”
-Rose Walker (The Sandman #65: The Kindly Ones by Neil Gaiman)
On a lighter note...one of my absolute favorite love songs, from one of the best movies in the world:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d22CiKMPpaY
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RE: Love
February 19, 2013 at 11:32 am
(February 19, 2013 at 12:18 am)Rayaan Wrote: An article that I read recently and it seems that now would be an oppurtune time to post it here:
Viewpoint: Down with romantic love
Quote:Love is blind, the proverb goes, though it might be more accurate to say we are being blinded by a hyper version of romantic love, and are losing out on life as a result. To cut to the chase, I think that the romantic myth is one of the most pernicious of our times.
The myth is that there is someone out there with whom your life will be complete, and conversely, without whom your life would be a half-life. A major task of modern life is, therefore, to find this person and, falling in love, to cease to be two and become one.
It is hard to prove, though I wonder whether such a view of romance has become so monstrous in the pressure it puts on couples to find fulfilment in each other, that it actually undermines more relationships than supports them.
That is just an opinion, though, but I think it might be true for some people.
Hmmm....
Quote:I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
--Rita Rudner
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