(November 20, 2013 at 5:25 am)Ivy Wrote: Aw, Rex. HUG*
I'd tell you to write a book, but you're doing that already. I'd tell you to go to school, but you've done that. I'd tell you start a business, but yeah. What if you go back to work? You could work in something different.
When I get bored I start a project. Thing with me is that my projects have to be short term, because they bore me and then I need a fresh idea. I'm never bored too long, because I'm always coming up with new things. Then again, who can be bored with kids?
I think you need something long term. Maybe going back to work in something challenging and different. Either that, or move. Start over.
Thanks Ivy
That's the thing: I dabble... I have crap tons of ideas, start them, and get too bored to finish- that's why my therapist put me on the ritalin: I had just signed a one-year lease on my shop and she didn't want me in over my head. I agree with the going back to work part... but to do what? Sitting at a desk sounds like a nightmare, let alone working for someone else at this point, and I've become sort of agoraphobic, although I can see that getting better if the right thing comes along. I definitely don't want to move. The only thing really keeping me going is the fact that I have a great core of friends and family (my sister moved here 2 1/2 years ago) around me all the time. If it weren't for them, I wouldn't still be here.
Damn. I look over this and I can't believe how whiny I sound. Sorry to shut things down. I think I'm getting old and set in my ways, which is also definitely not helpful.
Captain Colostomy Wrote:Maybe become a volunteer. It may help give you perspective and focus. Also, it just feels good.
I also hear pole dancing works wonders, but only if you have a web cam...
Haha! Maybe I could become a volunteer pole dancer? You just gave me a great idea for a not-for-profit!
I've done the volunteering thing, and definitely want to continue that, but part of my problem, I think, is that I haven't had any income in years now. It makes me feel shitty to not support myself because I did starting when I was about fourteen. Now, I feel like a spoiled brat living off daddy. It's funny to call myself a trustafarian sometimes, but the joke has gotten old.
Ivy Wrote:Oh, my. Usually I would, but it's rex! She's so cute, and makes hoops, and wore a nun costume. I kind of feel like I don't want to contaminate her with the dirty eyes of... all of us weirdos. lol
ok, fine. Rex, you could consider pole dancing. Maybe that could help you with the boredom
(psssst! Don't do it! Stay sweet and nun-ish!)
Haha! I'm not as innocent as I look!
GodsRevolt Wrote:I just wanted to pipe in that having your first business fail means absolutely nothing. I don't have the statistics on me, but a lot of successful business owners are on their second or third business. They refer to the first business as a "learning experience" or I remember hearing one say "baptism by fire" though I'm not sure how that rhetoric would sit on this forum.
The same with writing. If you go into it thinking that your first story is going to be the next Shakespeare, putting your name of college syllabi for years to come, then you are setting yourself up for failure. Stephen King had tons of rejection notes before he got published. They were a source of pride for him, not because he had failed but because he was going at it so hard.
I know I am on the "other side" in these parts of the web, but not following through is something that I definitely understand. I have a degree that I am not using and right now I am looking into anything but what the degree is for. I have no idea what I am doing with my life right now, feeling completely useless. But I found something that I really want for myself (it just happens to be writing as well) and I have made the decision to just do it because . . . why the hell not? I want it. For me. Since I made that decision, though, I have given up on it more times than an atheists curses God in Sunday traffic, but I'm still at it.
Honestly, I'm jealous that you had a "shop" at all. I always thought that would be cool. I never had the guts to set something like that up.
Anyway, take that as you will from the delusional guy in the corner.
Speaking of useless degrees, I have about a hundred of them I'm not using... including two bachelor's degrees in classical music! Woot!
I guess I don't really need my writing to be "successful" per se. I just enjoy doing it, until I start avoiding it, and then my computer cackles at me menacingly and it doesn't feel fun anymore. THat's why I'm working on three: if I get bored with one, I can work on another one.
What are you working on right now?
Zazzy Wrote:Also, many business schools have classes where students have to pick a small business and help it succeed- this REALLY helped an acquaintance of mine with an ailing business. Is there a big school near you where you might be able to benefit from something like this?
That's a really great idea, Zazz... I will look into it. There are several big universities around, along with some smaller community colleges (I know them well, lol) around.
whateverist Wrote:You sound manic depressive to me. My mom was one and I've experienced both ends of that. (I prefer the mania.)
But so what? Some people have manageable affects and can get by without meds. Do you think that's true for you? If not, why not be on meds? Lots of us here are medicated. No biggie.
But inspiration, hey? They say necessity can help but I don't think it is all that inspiring. In my experience it does no good to pander to my own happiness. I do better in the context of others. It feels good to have a role, a contribution to make, people who appreciate what you do for them, something that feels important to do. The nice thing is you don't even have to worry about what it pays, you can afford to start on the ground floor.
Have you made a list of what you have to offer? What are your strengths? How do you like to interact with people? Are you a people person? (You seem like one.) What can you do for others and what of that do you enjoy doing? Of course if you follow Ivy's advice, you could always have kids. They definitely make you feel needed and they're fairly long term projects too.
I've been screened for manic depression with negative results. I'm generally a cheery happy person, who happens to have major depression along with ADHD, which appears a lot like manic depression. I CAN get by without meds, but my big question is SHOULD I get by without them. I want to try some stuff before going back to them, but I'm willing to explore the idea in the near future.
I have made a list of what I have to offer, and it's so all over the place, I have no idea whom to offer my strengths to. I dabble and dabble to the point where I'm not an expert in anything. I am a people person- I waited tables and tended bar for twelve years- and restaurant management is something I've been looking at... I just haven't "worked" in so long, I'm nervous even just walking into a place with my resume.
Oh, and kids? No. I... no. Ivy, your kids are adorbs, and I love my friends' kids, but honestly, if my cat didn't meow at me incessantly every morning, I'd forget to feed her. I forget to feed myself most days. Kids are scaaaaarrrrry!
Walking Void Wrote:Wait, You want inspiration? An idea of what to do? Or is it motivation, like me, who finds my drive to act upon ideas to be missing? Which department are You, ambition (having dreams) or motivation (having drive)?
Sort of both. I have TONS of ideas, but no real "dreams" per se. And lots of drive/motivation/ambition for about a second before I get bored. I'm looking for inspiration to find my dream(s), which I hope in turn will give me the drive I need to see it through.
Thanks, guys, for your time and really good advice! Keep it coming if you've got more! Sorry if I seem stubborn... I really don't mean to be. I think it's just frustration. I only get this one life, and boredom is the last thing I want, you know? I am one of those lucky people with opportunities that others won't necessarily get, and I don't want to waste it.
