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I just put up with two to three hours of being bashed for my beliefs. My family got into a discussion about the Bible and god, and when I tried to bring up facts and science and philosophy, I was told to be "closed-off" to other opinions. I tried to leave before I got overly irritated.
As they explicitly stated, "closed-off" is not the same as closed minded. It just just means not accepting other views or willing to give them any ear to listen. (Which, as I tried to explain, is closed-minded). They did not accept and argued they didn't say I was close minded.
I was then informed that they only wish me to be open to the idea of other opinions. I stated, of course, I would believe it if they have evidence for it. I was told I only believed because I brainwashed myself with atheist books, and any quoting of their writings was equivalent of them holding to bible to proving their claims. Science and history/archeology is just totally open to interpretation, as every side of everything has evidence for both sides. I should be more tolerant and accepting and not such an "extremist" as I was into Christian days (since I believed homosexuality is wrong and that the lukewarm/unbelievers were in danger of eternal torment, which is honestly quite mainstream. They disregard this because they know Christians who don't "hate" homosexuals or talk about hell).
Another thing was they said we believe practically the same thing. They said they were more moderate with their beliefs and I was on the deep end of atheism. I said, "You're in a gray area and I'm in the black, were different." They said no, it's more of a whole spectrum of color, we're really not that far apart.
But I'm just an asshole for being so set in my beliefs, and not accepting their faith arguments, they even stated they were "what if" arguments, without evidence.
According to them, I should not read anything atheist at all for at least six months, because I'm obsessed with it. But they don't hate me for it, and are "accepting" otherwise. I suggested we just never discuss the topic, to agree to disagree, lest we bring any anger or hate towards our relationship. But I was told I meant that as a hateful comment, that I mean to use this whole scenario as a way to separate us, as my Christianity did.
I'm so god damn fed up with the Bible Belt, losing my friends first, and now my family. I am entirely alone in my beliefs, with honestly no hope of an atheist mate who isn't a crackhead, or any free-thinking friends. HALP pls
"The consolations of philosophy and the beauties of science; these things are infinitely more awe-inspiring and regenerating and majestic than any invocation of the burning bush or doctrine." - Christopher Hitchens
Good grief! Your family is so uneducated? As for your beliefs, it wouldn't matter if you never read another "atheist book" (whatever they are) your issue seems to be (and rightly so) based on evidence to "believe" anything. Quite frankly I don't think I believe in anything but certainly would put more trust in science evidence than anything some religious nutjobs would want me to be "open minded" about.
You Americans really suffer with this whole lack of education that develops into "Bible belts" don't you? We have them here in Oz (sort of) but being a bit more secular they don't have an impact. So. You are feeling isolated and alone.
What are we? Swiss cheese? joking. You have us here and I am sure you will find someone in your vicinity who thinks along the same lines.
"The Universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements: energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest." G'Kar-B5
(February 16, 2014 at 4:29 am)InevitableCheese Wrote: Science and history/archeology is just totally open to interpretation, as every side of everything has evidence for both sides.
Haha, I love that one.
If that is true then putting water into your car should be just as effective as putting petrol in.
At the end of the day they think that they are trying to help you. Most parents do this, and some of these are based on old superstitions, even amongst Atheist parents.
You might try explaining to your family that their worldview is based on faith, and that faith, no matter how sincere and honestly held it may be, is an opinion. You aren't required to respect the content of that opinion, but tell them you respect their right to hold it.
Balance the above with the position that your own worldview is based on facts and evidence, both positive and negative. The brute facts of the real world support your views, not theirs. Even negative evidence (no signs of a global flood, for instance) is seriously problematic for a Bible-based outlook on the world.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. They are manifestly NOT entitled to their own set of facts.
Good luck, mate.
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
(February 16, 2014 at 4:29 am)InevitableCheese Wrote: I just put up with two to three hours of being bashed for my beliefs.
My family got into a discussion about the Bible and god, and when I tried to bring up facts and science and philosophy, I was told to be "closed-off" to other opinions. I tried to leave before I got overly irritated.
As they explicitly stated, "closed-off" is not the same as closed minded. It just just means not accepting other views or willing to give them any ear to listen. (Which, as I tried to explain, is closed-minded). They did not accept and argued they didn't say I was close minded.
I was then informed that they only wish me to be open to the idea of other opinions. I stated, of course, I would believe it if they have evidence for it. I was told I only believed because I brainwashed myself with atheist books, and any quoting of their writings was equivalent of them holding to bible to proving their claims. Science and history/archeology is just totally open to interpretation, as every side of everything has evidence for both sides. I should be more tolerant and accepting and not such an "extremist" as I was into Christian days (since I believed homosexuality is wrong and that the lukewarm/unbelievers were in danger of eternal torment, which is honestly quite mainstream. They disregard this because they know Christians who don't "hate" homosexuals or talk about hell).
Another thing was they said we believe practically the same thing. They said they were more moderate with their beliefs and I was on the deep end of atheism. I said, "You're in a gray area and I'm in the black, were different." They said no, it's more of a whole spectrum of color, we're really not that far apart.
But I'm just an asshole for being so set in
my beliefs,
and not accepting their faith arguments, they even stated they were "what if" arguments, without evidence.
According to them, I should not read anything atheist at all for at least six months, because I'm obsessed with it. But they don't hate me for it, and are "accepting" otherwise. I suggested we just never discuss the topic, to agree to disagree, lest we bring any anger or hate towards our relationship. But I was told I meant that as a hateful comment, that I mean to use this whole scenario as a way to separate us, as my Christianity did.
I'm so god damn fed up with the Bible Belt, losing my friends first, and now my family.
I am entirely alone in my beliefs, with honestly no hope of an atheist mate who isn't a crackhead, or any free-thinking friends. HALP pls
So... what are these beliefs of yours?
I go by not-believing what those deluded after-lifers believe and try to shove in the rest of the world...
Be smart and use language the right way... that'll help you get your point across and acceptance will also come easier from those who just can't question their indoctrinated and self-deluded minds.
My whole family are staunchly religious, my mother is getting more and more right-wingy conspiracy theorist as she gets older. Occasionally I get into conversations with my mother or sister (my father and brother are much more tolerant and understanding) and I just destroy them with logic until they give up. I also live in Middle Tennessee, where the Bible is strong. So what do I do?
I use the right language, I stick to my guns with my family. Fortunately, I was never a theist, and my choice in friends from a young age reflects that. To deal with the emotional side, I try a little empathy. My family believes strange and stupid things about what happens when you die. They want to me to be with them, so it hurts when I so glibly dismiss their beliefs. Also, I get involved in the atheist community. No matter where you are, they are there. They might not be vocal, but they are there. Try meetup.com. There is an atheist community where I live, and I'm sure there is one where you live. I don't know how old you are, but if you haven't gone to college, make that decision with this in mind.
Have a conversation with your parents that doesn't involve what you don't believe, but how you feel. Seriously. How it makes you feel when they completely dismiss you (not your lack of belief), and how you need their support. I love my family with everything I have, and what they believe about God doesn't change that. It shouldn't change things for them, either, and if it does, they need to take a real close look at that Holly Babble of theirs.
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great
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February 16, 2014 at 1:03 pm (This post was last modified: February 16, 2014 at 1:28 pm by Alex K.)
I'm sorry to read that! How annoying...
As for finding a mate in the bible belt, where do you roughly live? Is there a Big City [TM] nearby? Most states in the Bible belt have some places where like-minded people are found...
(February 16, 2014 at 4:48 am)KichigaiNeko Wrote: Good grief! Your family is so uneducated?
I strongly disagree that what InevitableCheese writes about the family means that they are uneducated. They have a huge amount of unchecked beliefs and thinking habits.
