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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
I'm a goner

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I'm a goner
Tea Earl Grey Hot Offline
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#1
I'm a goner
May 31, 2014 at 4:47 pm
I am a little more concerned than I normally would be about a paper cut I suffered today...OMG WHAT IF I HAVE HYPOCHONDRIA?!
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Cato Offline
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#2
RE: I'm a goner
May 31, 2014 at 4:50 pm
(May 31, 2014 at 4:47 pm)Tea Earl Grey Hot Wrote: I am a little more concerned than I normally would be about a paper cut I suffered today...OMG WHAT IF I HAVE HYPOCHONDRIA?!

Licking a razor might help. Your paper cut will seem trivial and your reaction will certainly be commensurate with the significance of the wound.
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Nine Offline
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#3
RE: I'm a goner
May 31, 2014 at 4:52 pm
(May 31, 2014 at 4:50 pm)Cato Wrote: Licking a razor might help. Your paper cut will seem trivial and your reaction will certainly be commensurate with the significance of the wound.

The razor needs to be rusty.
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Tea Earl Grey Hot Offline
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#4
RE: I'm a goner
May 31, 2014 at 5:01 pm
Oh no, I searched paper cut on WebMD. I NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP FOR MY MENTAL CONDITION.
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Jackalope Offline
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#5
RE: I'm a goner
May 31, 2014 at 6:36 pm
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#6
RE: I'm a goner
May 31, 2014 at 6:37 pm (This post was last modified: May 31, 2014 at 6:39 pm by BrianSoddingBoru4.)
Easy, mate...you only THINK you have hypochondria. Which means, probably, that you really DO have hypochondria, but you only think that you really do probably have it.

Which means you do.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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downbeatplumb Offline
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#7
RE: I'm a goner
June 1, 2014 at 3:45 pm
Just because you are a hypochondriac doesn't mean you aren't ill.



You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.

Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.




 








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Whateverist Away Donators
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#8
RE: I'm a goner
June 1, 2014 at 4:04 pm
(May 31, 2014 at 4:47 pm)Tea Earl Grey Hot Wrote: I am a little more concerned than I normally would be about a paper cut I suffered today...OMG WHAT IF I HAVE HYPOCHONDRIA?!

If it becomes unbearable I wish you luck finding a doctor as kind as Kevorkian. (But suck it up man, your wit is needed around here.)
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max-greece Offline Donators
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#9
RE: I'm a goner
June 1, 2014 at 4:18 pm
The issue isn't about worrying whether you are a hypochondriac or not.

The issue is whether you are hypochondriac enough!

Its a worry - I think its making me ill.
Kuusi palaa, ja on viimeinen kerta kun annan vaimoni laittaa jouluvalot!
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vorlon13 Offline
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#10
RE: I'm a goner
June 1, 2014 at 9:34 pm
Who is to say the edge of the paper was not contaminated with a drop of virulent rat pus in the paper factory ??

Even at this very second rat MRSA and rat flesh eating bacteria are exponentially growing in the wound, killing vital tissues, releasing dangerous toxins, and attracting dangerous decay and rot loving spoors from the fetid atmosphere around you !!!!

Fungus and carrion flies even now can start to smell death upon your incipient corpse, and are gathering in the dark recesses of your home . . .

Doomed! You are doomed, I say !!!!
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I'm a goner



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