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What the dead man taught me
#1
What the dead man taught me
Hi, I'm Mike. I guess you could say that I began heavily doubting my religious beliefs when I got to college and began to learn more about the world around me and it's history. It wasn't just science and evolution, but anthropology that really got me thinking and questioning the christian upbringing I had. That and getting way into George Carlin comedy helped too.

That all started about seven years ago though. What I recently started having an issue with is some of the implications that come with being an Atheist. I didn't start having an existential crisis until a few months ago when I watched a man die.

I work as a Corrections Officer in a major U.S city. A while back I was assigned to go on a last minute ER run right before my shift ended. I arrived at our medical wing to see our nursing staff performing CPR on one of our inmates who had been detoxing from alcohol. Apparently he had some kind of delusional fit and began throwing himself around his cell and banging his head on the walls and bunk. Other staff had cell extracted him and placed him in a restraint chair to prevent further self harm and he just quit breathing as they were doing this.

Only twice in my life had I seen a dead body before. Both times were at the person's wake before a funeral. Never had I seen the look in a person's eyes as they passed away. Staff had broken the man's ribs doing the chest compression so his torso looked really squishy as he flopped around as they compressed again and again. His eyes looked glassed over and distant. The saying about the light leaving the eyes has some truth to it. I don't know much about medicine, but I knew he wasn't going to come back.

He was declared dead at the hospital not long after we arrived by ambulance. I remember the hospital chaplain asking me about the dead man. If he had any beliefs or religious affiliation. I didn't even know the inmate so I didn't know what to tell him. I just said that it really doesn't matter now. He tried telling me that it did and I just broke down and told him that if god loved him then he wouldn't have let him die on a jail floor because of a DUI charge. I guess I should have been more sensitive towards him.

Watching them wheel away his body made me think about the day that I would be on a stretcher, my meat sack being carted away. That would be it for me. I realized how much of a safety net I had back when I believed in a god. The thought that I would continue to exist in some non-physical form gave me a comfort, a shield if you will, that I did not notice until it was gone. I won't believe in something out of fear I won't exist one day, but I'm not sure how to face the horrifying thought that one day I will be gone and that will be that.

It isn't a great thought, but it is one I can't shake and I'm looking for a community to perhaps give me some insight, or things to look at differently. Thanks for reading.
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#2
RE: What the dead man taught me
Matey, me again.
Isn't death an absolutely natural part of our existence?
As humans, knowing we will die is the only reason we smile! Because we know that our current life will be gone in a blink of an eye.

I stopped stressing over that stuff yonks ago.
When you're old and frail and in your 80's or 90's, you'll be thinking differently about it all.
Our physical bodies were not designed to live a very long time.

I just make it my aim to be happy at all cost for as long as possible. Otherwise, why bother?
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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#3
RE: What the dead man taught me
Hey Mike, welcome Smile

Death is a tough subject for sure. The thing is, everlasting life was never on the table anyway. It was just a fake promise. Isn't it good that you've found that out now, rather than using your one and only life up thinking "This barely matters, I'm getting to the good stuff soon!"

Now you know this is it, you can truly make the most of it. You can pick your own purpose, and not be brown nosing Jesus or whatever for bling in the next life. Instead you can invest everything in this life.

I mean, if this is followed by an infinite existence, what would this life be worth in comparison? Nothing, basically. Now you know the truth, you've found out this life means everything.

As for death itself, how was 1768? Not so bad, huh? Smile That's what it will be like after you're dead. You won't be there to worry about it. All we can do is make the most of the time we've got, and look after each other.

I hope my fevered rankings helped a little. There's many ex theists here who I'm sure can help you better than I can (I'm an atheist lifer). Welcome and enjoy the forum! Let me know if you have any questions.
Feel free to send me a private message.
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#4
RE: What the dead man taught me
When I was a theist everlasting life horrified me because there wasn't a standard for who got in heaven. Everyone sins to some degree but we don't know God's tolerance for it. Considering what he did to Lot's wife for just looking back I figured it was rather slim and oblivion is much more appealing to me than eternal damnation.

Now I can focus on the here and now and identify my own purpose in life without stressing over nit picky rules such as honoring my parents or not taking the Lord's name in vain.

Contemplating your own mortality can be depressing but to ignoramus' point it helps put what you do have in perspective and helps you enjoy those things more.
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#5
RE: What the dead man taught me
Hey Mike! Welcome

Iggy's argument is a good one. Just thinking about what life was like when you were just a spermy will give you a little bit of peace about what death will be like.

I take comfort in the people around me. I seek to make the most of my relationships. I seek to maximize my happiness in this short time we have. I seek to do good in the world and leave it better than when I got here (I have some student loans I need to repay in this department.)

Take care of your body in the hopes that you live a bit on this rock. And be happy!
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great

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#6
RE: What the dead man taught me
Hello, Mike Smile
Nolite te bastardes carborundorum.
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#7
RE: What the dead man taught me
Death really does not bother me at all.  As robvalue stated above, the year 1768 was not bad at all for you.  That is what the year 2200 will be like for you.  None of this is new with either robvalue or me; here are the words of Epicurus:

Quote:Accustom yourself to believing that death is nothing to us, for good and evil imply the capacity for sensation, and death is the privation of all sentience; therefore a correct understanding that death is nothing to us makes the mortality of life enjoyable, not by adding to life a limitless time, but by taking away the yearning after immortality. For life has no terrors for him who has thoroughly understood that there are no terrors for him in ceasing to live. Foolish, therefore, is the man who says that he fears death, not because it will pain when it comes, but because it pains in the prospect. Whatever causes no annoyance when it is present, causes only a groundless pain in the expectation. Death, therefore, the most awful of evils, is nothing to us, seeing that, when we are, death is not come, and, when death is come, we are not. It is nothing, then, either to the living or to the dead, for with the living it is not and the dead exist no longer.

http://www.epicurus.net/en/menoeceus.html

Death really is not a bad thing at all.  Bad things only happen to the living, not the dead.

"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
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#8
RE: What the dead man taught me
[Image: elephant-framed.jpg]
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#9
RE: What the dead man taught me
Hi, Mike and welcome. I'm sorry you're having such a rough time right now. Losing your beliefs and becoming an atheist means not only accepting the finality of death, it also means accepting randomness. Randomness in the sense that unexpected and horribly tragic things sometimes just happen and there's no underlying meaning or greater purpose. It's a lot to deal with.  You made a smart move coming here. I think you'll find a  lot of support and understanding in this forum.

BTW, if you are actually an insomniac try to get some sleep somehow. As an insomniac myself, I know that not sleeping can make a tough situation downright brutal.
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#10
RE: What the dead man taught me
I'm not afraid of being dead, I just hope the dying ain't so bad.

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