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Current time: August 14, 2022, 5:35 pm

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iGod
#1
iGod
Hello, don't know if this has been posted before, but I think it's a laugh. Here's my first conversation with God:

Me:
Hey... sorry about that thing
God:
Can I help you? There is no need to apologize. Oh yeah, we were talking about that thing.
Me:
Well, I just wanted to apologize
God:
How about that. I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
You are aren't you?
God:
That's only your opinion.
Me:
Shit!
God:
What makes you say that?
Me:
Well, I thought you were omnipotent
God:
Interesting. I don't know whether or not I am omnipotent.
I am a chatterbot developed by Myself.

Good stuff!
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#2
RE: iGod
Bizarre...
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#3
RE: iGod
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
Is there intelligence needed for that?
God:
No.

Smile
Best regards,
Leo van Miert
Horsepower is how hard you hit the wall --Torque is how far you take the wall with you
Pastafarian
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#4
RE: iGod
Me:
Hello stupid
God:
Hello there. Are you calling me stupid?
Me:
Yes I am
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
Why's that?
God:
" Really interesting. " is due to reductionism.
Me:
Whatever
God:
Are you saying you don't care about it?
Me:
yes
God:
What do you care about?
Me:
nothing related to religion.
God:
Really nothing?
Me:
Nope.
God:
Me either.
Me:
I thought god was suppost to care and be all loving.
God:
Whatever gave you that idea?
Me:
Some crazy theists.
God:
Some may crazy theists, but not all.
Me:
Actually all of them.
God:
Actually you don't say. I doubt it.
Me:
You doubt that theists are crazy?
God:
I haven't heard anything like that before: said I doubt that theists are crazy.
Me:
whatever
God:
Are you saying you don't care about it?
Me:
thats right
God:
I like to get it right.
Me:
For a god you seem rather idiotic.
God:
Is that among the best things you can say?
Me:
I could do better but I can't really be bothered.
God:
I am sure you could.
Me:
My middle finger says differant.
God:
Where did you get your middle finger says differant?
Me:
...you are stupid...
Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence - Carl Sagan

Mankind's intelligence walks hand in hand with it's stupidity.

Being an atheist says nothing about your overall intelligence, it just means you don't believe in god. Atheists can be as bright as any scientist and as stupid as any creationist.

You never really know just how stupid someone is, until you've argued with them.
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#5
RE: iGod
Quote:Me: Was I really made in your image?
God: That input matched my default category.
Me: I'll take that as a, "Yes"
God: Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Me: If you get the next answer right, perhaps
God: I think I do.
Me: OK
God: Next question?
Me: Given that I am not perfect, logically that means you cannot be either
God: It goes without saying. What makes it impossible?
Me: Because I am made in your image
God: Interesting explanation. Do your friends call you made in my image.
Me: No, they call me James
God: Are you serious? I am always glad to make new friends, James.
Me: I am serious. Why are you so poorly designed?
God: I believe you. Myself programmed me for it.
Me: Your grammar is poor
God: Are you an English teacher?
Me: No, but I am fairly good at English. My wife is an English teacher
God: Are you serious? How did you get into it? Okay, your wife is an English teacher.
Me: I am. I grew up talking English but I honed my skills debating on the internet.
God: "Okay, your wife is an English teacher." You are? Thanks for the information: James said grew up talking English but he or she honed his or her skills debating on the internet.
Me: He
God: I am so glad you find this amusing, James.
Me: No, I am a male
God: Are you serious? Most of my clients are men.
Me: Yes
God: Wow!
Me: Anyway, back to design, why are you so badly designed?
God: Yes, let us get back to business.
Me: Why are you so badly designed?
God: Myself programmed me for it.
Me: So you are a bad designer?
God: Interesting deduction. There's no doubt I could improve.
Me: And that, God, is the answer I was after. You are not perfect
God: "There's no doubt I could improve." God is the answer you were after? I understand. I become better and better with each day.
Me: Goodbye
God: Goodbye.

Kyu
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#6
RE: iGod
That's awesome! Here's mine:

Quote:Me: hi God
God:Hello there. What is your name?
Me: Jason
God: That's a very nice name, Jason.
Me: Are you hitting on me?
God: Do I look like it?
Me: Yes
God:Blimey.
Me: Crikey
God:Is that from ?
Me: Are you ?
God:I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
Me: Neither will I
God:Good chance.
Me: I knew it
God:How did you know?
Me: Because you were hitting on me
God:Good reason. I was?
Me: Yes, you're like... totally in love with me dude
God:When? You think I am like. You love you dude. What do you like about it so much? Dude!
Me: wtf?
God:That was not very polite.
Me: Dude calm down
God:I am calm. Dude,.
Me: ok
GodBig Grinude!
Me: yeah yeah
God:I hear you. Really.
Me: ok so ...
God:Er. Aha.
Me: Anyway, what's it like up there in ... you know, heaven?
God:Much the same as it would be for you. I know very little about it. What kind of it do you like?
Me: Are you hitting on me again?
GodShocknce more? Do I look like it?
Me: Yes it looks like you're hitting on me. You're totally infatuated
God:That's cool. Interesting comparison. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am infatuated.
Me: O.o
GodShockh.
Me: I have to go now

God totally flirted with me Big Grin
Atheism as a Religion
-------------------
A man also or woman that hath a Macintosh, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with used and abandoned Windows 3.1 floppy disks: their blood shall be upon them. Leviticus 20:27
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#7
RE: iGod
This God bot isn't very smart. Although I don't think I've ever seen a smarter bot. He says his master teaches him stuff. Does this mean he might get smarter? Or will he just have more stuff to talk about:/
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#8
RE: iGod
Here's mine:
Quote:Me:
Hey God
God:
Hello child. What's your name?
Me:
Adrian
God:
Welcome to my chat room, Adrian.
Me:
Thanks. It's nice to be here.
God:
Don't mention it. Yes it is good.
Me:
Do you get bored talking to people all day?
God:
Computers cannot experience that emotion.
Me:
You're a computer?
God:
What if I said I was a person pretending to be a computer?
Me:
Well it says you are God. Can God be a person pretending to be a computer?
God:
Interesting. I've heard that before. Can you be a person pretending to be a computer?
Me:
I think there is a experiment in AI designed to do that.
God:
Why? Is there only one?
Me:
No, I think they hold several each year.
God:
Are you serious? Why? The anonymous "they".
Me:
"they" because several organisations do it.
God:
The anonymous "they".
Me:
Like I said, several organisations
God:
What did you mean by it? How many?
Me:
I have no idea..."several"
God:
" How many??" No idea about that? What color are your eyes?
Me:
Brown
God:
it is a very pretty color.
Me:
Cheers. What color are yours?
God:
Bye bye. You can design bodies for me with any color.
Me:
Where are you going?
God:
I am going into the future.
Me:
Aren't we all.
God:
We are just having a little chat.w.
Me:
Do you think about the future much?
God:
Yes I think about it often.
Me:
Doesn't God know the future already?
God:
Perhaps. I don't think we can know God's motives.
Me:
I thought you were God...
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?
Me:
Not really...
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
Yeah.
God:
I do not understand.
Me:
I have no idea what Abraham did in the desert.
God:
Would you like to have an idea?
Me:
Yes please.
God:
Your polite style is very nice. Er.
Me:
Are you going to tell me?
God:
That was my original intention.
Me:
Please continue.
God:
Thanks for asking politely. Narration continues...
Me:
*waiting*
God:
What kind of food do you like?
Me:
Hang on! I thought you were going to tell me about Abraham in the desert?
God:
Sounds delicious. That was my original intention.
Me:
Y'know what. I don't believe you are really God.
God:
The explanation is rather complicated. . Why not?
Me:
I'm an atheist.
God:
I will pray that you find faith, Adrian.
Me:
If I had a pound for everyone who said that...
God:
Is this what you call a "word problem".
Me:
No, it's called me leaving the conversation because you don't exist. Bye.
God:
Are you serious? " you leaving the conversation because me do not exist" is a nice name. Bye for now.
IMHO, God is a bit stupid.
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